Jarrad

Posted Tuesday, November 26, 2024

4mo

INTJ

Virgo

5

4

Reaching out, Holding on

From The Modern Enneagram (Melanie Bell, Kacie Berghoef), Object Relations: Type Fives (along with Twos and Eights) "... feel rejected by the world and like they need to bring something to others. Their strategies include offering people ... their knowledge and expertise... . These type's defense mechanisms attempt to gain acceptance while assuming the individual will not receive it." (Type Twos offer love and service, Type Eights offer strong protection). As a 5w4 (or maybe it’s the influence of being an INTJ), I’ve been feeling this dynamic acutely lately. Reaching out feels like offering myself up, knowing rejection is likely—but what else can I do? Doing nothing guarantees nothing, and connection is something I need. So, I try, again and again, through the pain, hoping someone will see me as I am and choose to stay. Sometimes I wonder which will come first: finding that connection or the pain becoming too much. Does this resonate with anyone else? Continuing to reach out through the pain, knowing that one connection will change everything?