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cheesebun

1mo

INFJ
Pisces

2w1

2

1

me rn. this is my exact situation RIGHT NOW.

ive stayed away from my dads family for years bc they're toxic af but because of recent developments my parents had to move in w one of them and wow im learning new details of the story and im just drained, tired, UPSET. and i still dont know everything. i just hope and wish everyone would heal. i dont wanna pass this onto my kids either. it has to end.

6

7

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Cedric

1mo

INFJ
Capricorn

2w1

2

1

I get that. I've broken off contact between both my parents because of constant toxicity growing up.

1

1

Reply

cheesebun

1mo

INFJ
Pisces

2w1

2

1

thing is i didnt grow up with my dads family, as a kid i didnt get it as an adult now i do. since ive become an adult ive tried avoiding my dads family even harder.

0

0

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Ron

1mo

INFP
Cancer

3w2

3

2

Welcome to the party!

0

2

Reply

cheesebun

1mo

INFJ
Pisces

2w1

2

1

i mean technically ive always known how trash my dads parents are, and how they messed up my dad & his siblings but my dad changed, he healed and changed where as everyone else has not. ive only known a bit of the big story, but im finding out newer and newer details and im just... tired, there is NOTHING redeemable about their parents i even refuse to call them my grandparents

1

1

Reply

Ron

1mo

INFP
Cancer

3w2

3

2

@cheesebun I'm sorry to hear that they are so bad. I see how that can hurt and know how this stuff can leave huge scars across a family. It can be especially hard when we can't have physical boundaries. And the work on healing is exhausting...and worth it. I truly believe!! I spent two hours today on a zoom call with amazing people doing the same work..it's beautiful to think we all collectively can bring this healing to others and the world. been healing a lot of general trauma along with relational/developmental myself. And the more energy I put into it the more I get to know my true self hidden under burdens left by family, world, society. The more open I am to the idea that everyone is doing the best they can to protect themselves. And prevent their own hurt parts from getting triggered. Many are just smashed and blinded by them with no knowledge of a different way. Acceptance and understanding and forgiveness hold a lot of power for me personally. And I hope to reach the point where I can forgive them... I don't have to let them back in. But let the hurt parts in me release their burden. And accept them and others..... Sorry for the bit of a rambel. I hope you find your healing road as amazing as i.have found mine.

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