Introversion

Question

Can people who used to be extroverted change to introversion?

What makes someone a 'true' introvert?

Is some intriversion trauma based?

Joseph · Accepted Answer

In my opinion when extroverts say their also introverts they actually just arnt surrounding themselves with the right people I find. Even as an introvert when I'm around even one person who I truly enjoy being around I can converse with people 10x better.

Dustin · Answer

While I self proclaim that I am extroverted introvert, it's trauma that causes my introvertedness and my battery to drain quicker than most. Sure, I can go to party...for an hour before I'm sick of people and drama. It's not that I don't want to be there, I love to socialize, but when most people find me weird or out of place and give me the cold shoulder, why am I going to put forth effort?

Lancey Pants · Answer

Well, the answer is kind of complicated and proof that binaries can actually limit our thinking. The terms 'introvert' and 'extrovert' imply a binary to the layman but much like gender it's more like a spectrum. There is also the term 'ambivert' (someone with balanced in/ex) but these are archetypical descriptors and really shouldn't be applied to any one person. No one is fully any of the three and yes you can change over time. There are ambiverts but they're not in perfect balance all the time and that applies to introverts and extroverts. I'm usually introverted, sometimes extroverted, and rarely ambiverted and that's gonna change with time and be different for anyone at any given time 😊

Matthew aiken · Answer

Yeah I feel I sit on both sides of the fence here partially trauma but also happy with having 2/3 honest and true friends I can empathise and be myself around. Then there’s the “outside world” where I’m more guarded and distrusting of people on account of drama and shallow friends etc and I see the appeal for “transactional encounters” outside of that limited trusted friend group plus a few online pals of course. Ultimately the world is a lot more hostile than it used to be and that’s not just my own opinion, sadly it’s a fact these days. I actually find that since covid especially I’ve withdrawn more. I was once threatened by a number of customers at my work cause I was withdrawn and depressed at work instead of happy like other members of staff, which in these cases were taken personally by these people who thought I was being rude on purpose when in fact I was wiped out emotionally. I since left that job and am happier working night shift and feel a part of my old pun slinging happy self returning. Still avoid people mind you that I consider strangers I probably won’t encounter much because it’s an effort I feel would be wasted. Acute anxiety, aspergers and depression don’t mix well I will say but I manage well enough. 😅🤷‍♂️

Matthew · Answer

I think introvert and extrovert can just be seen the continuum of how much attention you spend on your internal mental life vs external life. Being extroverted or introverted by itself is not a bad thing in principle. It affects things, but depending it doesn’t mean anything is wrong with a person.

But it can be a symptom associated with certain things considered to be unhealthy disorders. Specifically ones where social withdrawal is a major factor.

For example, avoidant personality disorder is where someone has such an extreme self of internalized shame that they feel unworthy of socializing with others, they fear judgement from others in the extreme so their social is basically to just stay away from others. Social anxiety is related, but doesn’t involve such an extreme sense of shame. Shyness/social anxiety can be helped just like overcoming a fear. But dealing with a sense of internal shame is a bigger problem.

The other personality disorder I can think of is schizoid personality disorder which is characterized by a person who has very few relationships with other people at all. Unlike the avoidant, they tend to feel fine with who they are and it fits in with their self-image that they are alone. So some argue that it should not be considered unhealthy. But they also suffer from anhedonia, which means they cannot gain pleasure from doing things. They may not even enjoy talking to other people much more than being afraid of doing so. It may be boring to them. So they focus on an internal fantasy world that is more meaningful to them than the external world. The other thing that their empathy is impaired.

Impaired empathy means seeing other people as not humans. More as resources where the transaction is, “Do they help me or harm me?”

For example, they may interact in bare minimum transactional circumstances like getting food or earning money in a solitary job to avoid creation of close emotional bonds and to stay away from boredom.

There is schizophrenia and autism which are different things but could both involve a lot of social withdrawal. Though the causes are different.

Regardless a “normal/healthy” introvert should have a sense of security in themselves. If they want to go out to socialize, they can do it when they have the energy and desire; if they are alone they are not doing it because they are hallucinating or fear of other people. They can become emotionally close to other people and empathize with them.

Unhealthy can mean these things are lacking where social withdrawal is a way to deal with these things. But social withdrawal by itself doesn’t need to be a bad thing. Someone can have 1, 2 or 3 friends and be happy, be capable of empathy in principle. So there is nothing in need of “changing” or “fixing” for such people. But either way, I don’t think we should be force other people to change even if they are not considered “healthy” it depends what is but ultimately they must want to change.

Spielberg Nizzola · Answer

That's a fascinating question. I believe that, oftentimes, our personality traits are influenced by the environment we've lived in, and these tendencies are strengthened over time. For example, what we call introversion might often be a result of social pressure (rejection) or limited exposure to large groups. Extroversion might be similarly shaped – frequent interactions with large groups, especially for specific achievements, can reinforce those types of behaviors. Can these traits change? Absolutely. Any behavior can be influenced and reinforced

Introversion

Introverts Community

In my opinion when extroverts say their also introverts they actually just arnt surrounding themselves with the right people I find. Even as an introvert when I'm around even one person who I truly enjoy being around I can converse with people 10x better.

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