Posted Friday, March 1, 2024
1y
ENTJ
Virgo
8
7
7Gentlemen
Anyone care to explain to me the issue in expressing emotion? Particularly THIS type I’ve noticed seems to have difficulty sharing their feelings in relationships. Such as: physical affection, verbal affirmation, playfulness/flirtaciousness, intimacy/foreplay - or in the least initiating these things seems uncomfortable for this type. Yes I’m aware this is almost a generational theme at play overall some would say, but I’d like to focus on ISTJs here and ask if any would like to provide some insight? Thoughts gentlemen?
12
26
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Drew
1y
ISTJ
Sagittarius
23
3Well considering I am one, according to this system, I can say that it's something that usually takes time. For me, I know I come off as a serious "no nonsense" kind of person initially. After a while though, those walls break down and you'll get to see the playful side of me. I am actually very physically affectionate, but again, it takes time to be comfortable with someone. Expressing emotion outside of people I'm comfortable with is just not something that I do, if the person isn't going to have a significant impact on my life, why bother? So I guess the key to that is being patient and understanding while someone comes out of their sometimes very thick shell.
4
2
Michael
1y
ISTP
Pisces
21
1TL;DR, see image. Alright, I’ll include myself in this on the grounds that I used to get ISTJ results on these tests earlier in life. It’s a learned behavior. A conditioned response. Society expects boys to only exhibit a narrow range of acceptable emotions and doles out social punishments to those who deviate from expectations. And so we learn to clam up to defend ourselves. And the shell grows so thick that it becomes nigh impossible to shed. The thing is, these societal expectations run so deep that even people who claim to want men to be more emotionally open will often have the same negative response as everyone else when it actually happens.
5
1
kyu
1y
ISTJ
Scorpio
56
6well, i'm not a guy but having talked to other istjs and from my own experience it can have something to do with their self-image in general. for me and some other istjs i know it can be hard to open up emotionally because of the need to be perfect, and sometimes showing vulnerability to others takes that away and makes you feel weak and it can be very hard to deal with. other people affirming those feelings has made it easier for me personally, but even then i'm very careful with what i show to others. and of course toxic masculinity can make it especially tough for guys.
3
1
Justin
1y
ISTJ
Sagittarius
According to the test I was flagged as an ISTJ. I don't put much stock in the personality test but I'm sure it has a bit more going for it than my horoscope. I can't speak to your myriad of experiences but I feel like there are some aspects of the personality type that could be at play ... introvert tendencies, being reserved, grounded, overly logical etc. There may be something to that where you haven't managed to pull them out of their shell to open up. Could be some walls they've built up. Could be a mismatch in their particular "love languages" maybe the particular guys your encounter were interested in different forms of affection? Could be they are taking a "wait and see" approach with you. You might be putting down what you think are hints and green lights but they are seeing something completely different. They may be not sure of your interests and afraid to make that move... society has messed with a lot of men and many more don't want to be targets of the mob for making an unwanted move. Could be a miscommunication in your needs and theirs somewhere along the line? Might just be a mix of all the above?
2
1
Marcus
1y
INTP
Leo
23
3I think your taste in men is your problem girl, maybe try swapping up people you talk to?
1
0
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