Varun khullar

Posted Tuesday, May 9, 2023

11mo

ENFJ

Virgo

2

3

Failures....

So one day I was sitting and evaluating what are my failures and success.. Then it come up to my mind do I need to evaluate those things which are part of my life which come and go or for instances are always around me in small and big events of life and soul.. So let's start my evaluation from my birth... I was about to die which could have ended my life when I was born in my mother womb I gulped the dirt and my wind pipe of my breathing choked, doctors gave up everyone thought I won't survive. This is what I was told by my grandparents parents and my elder who love me so much and fees years back when I met the doctors who were there trying to save me 1 day old child they said you defeated the death and that was miracle it gave me the chance to think when I didn't give up on the first day of life failures and I aged upon why should I give up now.. Then many instance came and went I grew up tall fro strength to strength Then again obstacles happened in my life stages with my studies as I was never a bright student.. Always looking for something fictional in reality or may be a soul who want to learn why 2+2 was 4 what was the reason.. In my times in 90s If you are not good in studies you are considered bad or worst, things were like I failed in many exams prelims, got teachers scolding, parents scolding, made fun of my failures by my relatives, even some those emotions were expressed where I thought that's enough nothing is happening around me let's figure out why I am like that, I failed alot of times, though in my early days of schooling I always felt failing is a, sin or a crime which I always commit and I ll be punished, this, was my perception. I become too timid too shy.. As relatives of toxic people purposly used to make fun of my failures of my educational aspect This I carried off till the time I completed my schooling up and down with my failures were always there.. Then cames my 20s life where I lost a, lot too with my failures, same thing went up and I was depressed with my efforts and frankly speaking when someone goes through a lot of failures a person get negative towards, a, positive approach in life, though I was pretty strong.. No matter what, happens I won't vomit suicide, as many relatives and people were so toxic with me who gave me so much of toxic approach towards my emotions, then a, bright sunshine came and I started looking my failures are best, part of my life in a, postive manner because toxic relatives doesn't valued my actually wisdom or intellegence they kept my attire of self respect dented with their comments and making fun of my failures.. Due to which, again lost a lot of emotions and feelings, then I developed a habit of reading, and working on my writings which gave me a, space to interact with those who go through Failures and commit suicide I always tell my fellow people it's not what makes you fail in life looks like it's like what others drag you to make you realise that you are worthless To those who ll never understand your feelings.. One sentence for them I carry on my dialact... Don't come my way... Or else I ll ruin your whole high way My life is changed I keep going thought failures and success in life And I realised that I should stay away from toxic people and if someone comes my way thrash them hard I call my self jack of all failures and I love to enjoy my failures It makes me successful in life It makes me evaluate my emotions and people who are mine And I give a high five to my failures Best of luck to my failures I ll defeat you don't worry This is my Advice to my all fellow followers