Confession of a broken heart

I’ve always gotten lost in the smell of the perfume, the visions of pleasure and hopes of the bedroom... Always found my self searching for lesser-intentions; I wanted a friendship, but in lust..instead, Got stuck admiring those selfie selections! My worldly desires always seem to end up; Nothing but tortured, but now...I thank God... The shallow, will no longer Define—my future! Those women are flashy ,sometimes trashy, Yet nevertheless...so gracefully they do pose! Their figure and body language... More defined—than fine wine! ...That... We cannot help but admire, As their Countenance’...shine, Though; lo and behold... They offer what’s outward not... inside! through a picture and a pose; Falsely-presenting flawless effort—so refined. With make up adorning, Said—reality of many.. I ponder the thought... Does she seek envy or penny? So, bravely I pray; For freedom from fleshy desires, As I; ask that her insight... Sound precious like choirs! I reach out to heaven... seeking his wisdom. My goals not to get laid, But find that key to his kingdom! I ask my dear savior, “Lord keep me from danger.” Even-when I first meet her, We’ll be anything but strangers... Now the life of a sinner, Continues evolving more righteous.. When I seek first his kingdom, Theirs no doubt that she’s priceless. More precious than jewelry, More honest than pure gold.. Her presence round’ my neck; Need not ask for a clasp... Sinncerity binds it effortlessly—no hold! ...Now... Those before her will have felt, More like loves attraction... was a chore. So... Like a patient, I wait patiently; As I ask my redeemer... “Lord if I’m ready for love, please open the door!” Yet need not I ask, For in His time... I shall, receive certain cure.. In his will—he has a plan furthermore, Some day soon...In my heart... Trust in a woman, will truly be restored. I found my self praying—life might become... Different before me; if I chose first her story—not outwardly beauty! He knows my intentions, Knows my heart truly... For some; my words might sound hollow... Yet love precedes duty! “My lord, My redeemer; I don’t know your plan now!” When the day arrives... I won’t understand how! “Yet faithfully, My heart O’ gold... awaits proud! Because—whomever she may be... I’ve prayed that she needs me... AMEN” Russ 2021