Championing someone, rooting for their success, and believing in their dreams is a beautiful act of kindness. It reflects our capacity for generosity. However, this act requires a delicate balance. We can't afford to lose ourselves in supporting others, especially those who don't reciprocate our investment. This applies to all relationships, whether romantic, platonic, or even within the context of ethical non-monogamy (ENM) or BDSM. I remember pouring my heart and soul into supporting many of my former partners. I believed in their vision and offered my time, skills, and energy as resources. Initially, it felt fulfilling, reflecting our connection and shared goals. However, as time went on, I felt drained. My partners, while appreciative, seemed to take my support for granted, rarely acknowledging my efforts or offering reciprocal support. This imbalance eventually led to resentment, and ultimately, the relationships faltered. They faltered because they weren't honest about what they truly wanted in their own lives. To champion someone who offers nothing in return risks eroding our self-worth. We must cultivate a deep understanding of our desires and needs, a clarity that allows us to discern genuine connections from a transactional exchange. This is especially important in ENM relationships, where clear communication and consent are crucial for navigating complex dynamics and ensuring everyone feels respected and valued. In BDSM, power dynamics must be acknowledged and addressed to ensure that both partners feel safe and respected. A dominant partner who takes without giving, who sees their submissive partner as merely a means to their own end, is betraying the trust and respect that are essential to a healthy and fulfilling relationship. We have to be ruthlessly honest with ourselves. Are we truly giving out of a place of abundance, genuine care, and admiration? Or are we seeking validation, a sense of self-worth through their success? If the latter is true, it's time to take a step back and re-evaluate. The human heart craves reciprocation, a resonance of shared purpose and mutual growth. To champion someone who takes without giving is to betray our own intrinsic value. We are not vessels to be emptied, but fountains to be shared, sources of inspiration and support to be reciprocated. Championing someone who doesn't invest in us, who doesn't see us as worthy of their own support, can leave us feeling drained, resentful, and ultimately unfulfilled. We deserve to be with people who see our value, who champion us back, who make us feel complete, not depleted. This is not about being selfish; it's about self-preservation. Our energy is precious, and we must invest it wisely. The path to fulfillment lies in forging relationships where giving and receiving are in harmonious balance. To champion someone who champions us back, who sees us as worthy of their own investment, is to embark on a journey of shared growth, a tapestry woven with threads of mutual respect and admiration. This is true whether we are in a monogamous or polyamorous relationship, or exploring the world of BDSM. Let's not waste our energy on one-way streets. Let's build relationships where mutual respect, admiration, and support are the cornerstones. Let's choose to be surrounded by people who make us feel seen, valued, and empowered. Let us choose to champion those who see our worth, who mirror our passion, who nourish our souls with their own. Let us cultivate relationships that are not merely transactional, but transformative, where the act of giving and receiving becomes a dance of mutual elevation. Let's choose to champion those who champion us back. Because, let's be real, who wants to be stuck in a relationship where they constantly give and never get anything back? Let's choose to build something better, something where we both win, because that's what love is all about: mutual respect, shared growth, and a commitment to each other's well-being.

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