Double Standard

Question

Why is it that when men who are 40+ date women in their early 20s are called "perverted creeps" while when women who are 40+ are seeking younger dudes is "empowering?”

IVY ROSE · Accepted Answer

I don't think it's empowering at all. I think it's gross. 🤢

Milady · Answer

Don't see how there's a double standard, when men have been historically marrying little girls for generations 😬 its like asking your dad why you shouldn't be around older men by yourself, as a little girl. We all know the answer why

David · Answer

Standard social hypocrisy.

No different than if I somewhat dislike a specific ~individual~ with a different skin tone I'm automatically a racist. 
But it's ok to HATE me (and anyone that looks like me) because of my skin tone.

People as a society don't know how to stop and think about the fact that every person is different and every situation between two people is different.

It's possible for a 42 year old man and 22 year old woman to have a perfectly healthy relationship. 
"It's not the years, it's the mileage" is a perfect saying to illustrate the point. 
She may have had a very hard life for those 22 years and become a very mature and well rounded person, essentially older than her ID says she is. 
Meanwhile, he may have led an easy life for 30 of those 42 years and has just recently matured enough to settle down and start looking for something real and meaningful. 
But society can't see those details. They only see 22F and 42M and say oh he's just a perv that likes them young and she's too young and innocent to realize she's being used.

My opinion anyway. May not be true world-wide, but that's my take from the US.

Jaime Pagan · Answer

Hi DeVanik,

The double standard you are referring to is often referred to as the "May-December romance." This double standard is rooted in gender biases and societal expectations surrounding age, power, and gender roles. Historically, men in positions of power and authority have been seen as more desirable and attractive, while older women have been seen as less attractive and past their prime.

This double standard continues to persist, even though attitudes and values about relationships and aging are changing. The idea of "cougar" or "sugar mama" as a label for older women seeking younger partners is a stereotype, and like all stereotypes, it oversimplifies and ignores the complexity of individual experiences and relationships.

It is important to recognize and challenge these double standards, and to instead focus on the qualities and characteristics that make a relationship healthy and fulfilling, regardless of the partners' ages. Everyone deserves to pursue relationships that bring them happiness and fulfillment, without judgment or stigma.
"FYI I'm not a Doctor But I Play One on the internet 🤠."

Double Standard

Psychology Community

I don't think it's empowering at all. I think it's gross. 🤢

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