Posted Tuesday, December 2, 2025
1mo
ENTJ
Taurus
7Deep conversations
Do you prefer superficial light hearted conversing or diving deep into childhood trauma mind bending adventures? Some consider being an open book "trauma dumping" while I personally just don't care what people think. To me if you cannot handle me stating what I've been through in a text or phone call that doesn't give me much hope for the future. Life is full of negatives and positives which means you should to be able to talk about those things with people you would like to be close with. Thoughts? (edited)
48 votes
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Zachary
1mo
ENTP
7I think it depends on the degree of emotional intimacy between people, and how "being an open book" and "trauma dumping" are defined. I don't think that actual trauma dumping is ever conducive to conversation with someone new, other than a professional. That said, I think it should be perfectly acceptable to discuss the topic it with a partner, but that they should be informed beforehand. Bringing it up out of nowhere wouldn't really be fair to them. I'd say that discussing it with friends or a potential partner is a grey area, and is dependent on closeness and a variety of other factors. In my opinion, good friends will listen, but it's hard to say with a potential partner. Personally, I'm fine with conversation about anything, other than illegal stuff of course (edited)
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Kazper
1mo
ESTJ
Cancer
5The thing about trauma dumping is that some people hear it and they think they can fix you. So you just become a project to them and the relationship can becomes disingenuous. Some people even have trauma kinks and will only be with you because of your trauma. I get that you dont want to waste your time but not everyone deserves your trust, and not everyone can see past your trauma. Imagine being intimate with someone and they reference a traumatic experience you shared with them. Not a great feeling tbh. Trauma dumping is not the same thing as open book in my opinion. (edited)
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Tina
1mo
INTP
Capricorn
Well well well… And i thought deep conversations are about deep thoughts, not trauma dumping…
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Jack
1mo
INFP
Aries
4I'm all for deeper conversations, but you do need to respect the other person. They may not want to hear it in that moment, they may not want to draw as close, they may get triggered themselves, etc. It's one thing to discuss, it's another to rant. Do you just start going into your problems, or is it that the conversation naturally turns that way? If you do that and don't care what they think, well... why is someone supposed to care about your thoughts?
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Guy-O-Blanco
1mo
ISTP
Aquarius
8Honestly to go deep the person has to get me. I am very private. There has to be a connection there for me to feel comfortable to open up. I don’t like being messy
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Ailyn
1mo
INFP
1I openly talk about my trauma with many people actually. However, sharing my insight on my trauma is different for me. I won’t get deep into how it truly affected me until I trust you. Weirdly enough, I don’t trust a lot of people with my insight due to fear of invalidation. But yeah, I prefer small social circles anyway. I can focus more on individual friends that way. So I won’t hesistate to deny people further access to me if I need to.
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