Forever stuck in a crush phase

Question

So, I've never dated anyone ever... Well, not seriously anyway. To me it seems like I'm never the girl who is chosen, the girl someone would choose to be serious with.  My social anxiety has gotten worse. The bad part is living in a new country with no support system. My job keeps me busy, but it's the weekends when I go out for a walk to get out of my apartment that secretly (well, not a secret anymore) kill me. Just watching someone with their someone thinking: "It would be nice"...   Here's the thing though. I've somehow convinced myself that I'm undateable (I know, not a word but bear with me). I look at someone that I really like, but my face tells a different story. I realise that I probably look unapproachable with my resting b face. It's a front though.  So, I watch in silence admiring someone, but never do anything about it. I hate this eternal crush phase  This is probably an overshare, but I literally have no one to talk to.  Love and light ✨

Accepted Answer

This really resonate to my current dating situation and I'm exhausted just to go outside during weekend, I only had one day off and that's spent on oversleeping 🤣  It's alright to feel that way. In the meantime, please do crazy worthwhile activities whenever you can.  Single or not, you're worth it to be cherished and loved 💖💖💖💖💖

Answer

Despite the anxiety, force yourself to go out and be social. My roommate used to be a hermit, then he bought a fun hat that a lot of people dont wear casually to draw attention to himself on purpose, to get used to the looks and feel more confident wearing it. It's something simple like that which could help you in your situation, maybe not, but doesn't hurt to try. Or wear a funny t-shirt and get comments from it and talk to them, get out there more and just be yourself, maybe only go out for an hour and then gradually make it 2 or 3.  You just gotta keep practicing and break that anxiety and go out of your comfort zone. It's hard and all you wanna do is run home but just let yourself face a new challenge, see how long you can go before you can't do it, and practice that as often as you can. Hope this helps :)

Answer

Been in this phase,only u can break the circle ,and feeling enough about yourself 🙂🤝

Answer

Try to fill your mind with other things than dating, try to "date yourself" treat yourself how you wish to be treated by a man. I don't know if you did this already, but labelling yourself with a negative label by yourself is a bad move: don't do it. Chill, life is too complicated to make a very simple conclusion about yourself.   Love and light ✨

Answer

I actually understand how much it stings. To be stuck in a loop like that. Look having a positive mindset goes a long way in keeping these thoughts at bay. You are beautiful in your own way, don't let any thoughts or anyone say otherwise. Also enjoy your own company for now. Coz once you in a relationship, these moments are very rare. Work on yourself, Do things you always wanted to do, learn new things, chill out at home. Love comes when you are least expecting it. Hope this is helpful 😅 Just some tips from a fellow struggler. Have a great day.💙

Answer

One thing that helped me a lot was to genuinely be myself and focus more in my interests and passions; when I was trying "too hard" I did manage to obtain results but I was kinda miserable anyway; so, learning to love myself, my time in solitude focusing just in being me...it just naturally start attracting people, friends and more; I would recommend to actually go and do that, just do what you love, be passionate about it, and once some one arrives, you will be able to share who you really are with them and if they don't stick around, well there's going to be someone who actually does, and it's going to be just as natural as it meant to be

Answer

I think you need to love yourself and gain confidence first. You don't have to socialize hard from day one, but starting by going outside for walks in nice areas (parks are good) to get familiar with the outside world is a good idea. Doing sports (by yourself first) really helps building confidence and get in a better mood that makes you know what you're up to.

Answer

This is so relatable it actually stings.

Answer

As someone going through a similar phase, please don't let this affect you too much. Keep you engaged with other things that might interest you. The right one will find you soon :)

Answer

i feel the same way about myself. i dont have so much social anxiety though. its more like ive been hurt soooo many times by people i am just too tired to try anymore.

Answer

Yeah, it's tough when you feel like you're stuck in a crush phase and social anxiety is getting the best of you. But remember, you're not undateable, and there are ways to work on your social anxiety. Seek help or connect with people who share your interests. You're not alone in feeling this way, and there are ways to make it better.

Answer

You'll get stuck in this phase of you post at this length!! . . . . Real ppl get wasted nd stomped... Either get cringey or fight the cringey!!!

Forever stuck in a crush phase

Psychology Community

Been in this phase,only u can break the circle ,and feeling enough about yourself 🙂🤝

This is so relatable it actually stings.

As someone going through a similar phase, please don't let this affect you too much. Keep you engaged with other things that might interest you. The right one will find you soon :)

i feel the same way about myself. i dont have so much social anxiety though. its more like ive been hurt soooo many times by people i am just too tired to try anymore.

You'll get stuck in this phase of you post at this length!! . . . . Real ppl get wasted nd stomped... Either get cringey or fight the cringey!!!

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