Romance is Dead — And I'm So Tired of Pretending It's Not

Question

I’m so sick of pretending that real love—the kind that makes your heart race, that makes you feel seen, chosen, cherished—actually exists in real life. Because let’s be honest: the kind of men I want? They only exist in movies and books.

Where is the man who remembers the little things without needing reminders? Who makes me feel safe with just one look, who shows up when it matters, who isn’t emotionally stunted or terrified of commitment? Where is the guy who communicates like a grown adult, who isn’t still juggling “options,” or looking over his shoulder for something better the second things get real?

I want the man who fights for love. Who texts first. Who cares. Who loves boldly and consistently. The man who makes it clear that I’m not just another temporary thrill—someone who makes me feel like I’m the damn main character, not a filler scene in someone else’s storyline.

But no. That guy? He’s fictional. He’s a script, a paragraph, a character on a screen. He’s not in my messages. He’s not at the grocery store. He’s not anywhere close to reality.

Medhat · Accepted Answer

Part of the problems is expectations. I guarantee you people like that exist 100%, but no one will be a text-book "good man" bc no one is perfect. I tend to believe true love does exist but its not like the image of love we get from movies and TV. True love only exists when both sides want to create it and are willing to accept eachother no matter what. I have a lot more to say tbh but enough yappin

Drae · Answer

I won’t say that romance is dead, but you are onto something real. The dating standards for men in society have been put through the ringer and unfortunately so have a lot of men and women. With divorce rates as high as they are and people being hurt by others constantly it makes it difficult for people to see love and choose it despite the unsure reality. Most question if it’s even worth it. However, there are men and women who choose love and fight for it, it’s just that fighting for it in the past has got them hurt.

But don’t lose hope, it’s not fictional, it’s real. Romance is real, but it’s not always expected. The love you want won’t be found it’ll be earned through hard work. You don’t have to find a man who already does the things you listed, you just gotta find one that’s willing to pursue romance the same way.

Don’t give up. You have to make romance real again, and so does everyone else.

Dre · Answer

It’s tough out there, but the guy you’re dreaming of really does exist. He’s not just a character in a book. There are many of us out there just like that, so don’t give up hope. Romance is an easy path for some, but for most it is a great many trials. Best wishes and take care.

Sri Ram Nanda · Answer

Yes your are correct... Sad thing is the boys or men do feel same in their version...

Now tell me who is correct and who is not...

Tim · Answer

It's funny because I'm a lot like that when I start falling for a woman, but I can't find one to fall for.. you just have to look open your heart and hope you found a good one.. they are out there.. it's just people have a hard time picking or finding the good ones.

Nikola · Answer

it still exists, but been around with a blindfold is the problem
so simply if the men is not interested that much he puts no effort for you
or if he puts effort on you and you still you show no effort for him juat because you like someone else or want to play on cat and mouse
 he lose interest 
and thats how you lose a good man because we have respect about feelings and if we’re not wanted we will just leave you to be happy 😊

Alexandre Michel Etienne · Answer

But is does exists.
But two facts :
 - must be truly emmotionnaly mature, and both sides.
 - not everyone is made for this kind of love. May be you are, may be you are not. Because it is a give and get, and some want what they are not ready to give.

Alen · Answer

There's a lot of them out there, but unfortunately a lot of women say the same exact thing and then find it suffocating and boring,as said not all but most of them

Nathan Hobbs · Answer

Hmm...

Well, I guess you haven't met me then. Or my father. Or my mentor

We exist, but you won't find us without looking, sweetheart. And you need more than looks to get us

Moiz · Answer

Bada booii

Richard Gibbons · Answer

I'm a hopeless romantic at heart I refuse to believe that Romance is dead but like with anything good that happens in your life is time is that factor and Making sure God leads the way when choosing that special someone der is too many men and women for there not to be someone out there for you to be alone we weren't meant for that connection is where we shine

Ricky · Answer

I do all of those things… except remember the small things. I am a squirrel.

Ivan Perak · Answer

Hey Connie 👋 .
Have you ever red any book on how man and woman are different but together they fit perfectly if both of them play own default roles ?
Mainly is issue in deviant education system where they teach us we both same and equal when we are not .
Man will play properly its role if he have properly orientated woman by his side playing her default role by design and vice versa .
Hey , i am just writing what i researched .
I haven't create man or woman or wrote spiritual laws and how things have to be right .
What each part of one have to do for things to functional normal .
Read my bio , part of things i require from woman are written there .
I don't want to play any role in relationship but one that i have by default .
To be man , husband , parent and provider for family starting from spiritual , through mental and rest of required skills .
I am watching whole life how partners not doing their roles in relationships or simply switch roles which is even worse .
Thing is , lots of last generations lost their roles which are given to them by default and they left in to abominable behavior .
There are proper men and woman but due to toxicity of abominable behavior they probably are in safety of solitude waiting for a day when they will play their true default roles with someone who will also behave by default as they should .
In general both genders don't know how other one funkcion and what other one need .
Well very often they themself don't know what they need to do as default male or female role .
Heterosexual is only true natural orientation .
I don't have to write further .

Romance is Dead — And I'm So Tired of Pretending It's Not

Relationshipadvice Community

It’s tough out there, but the guy you’re dreaming of really does exist. He’s not just a character in a book. There are many of us out there just like that, so don’t give up hope. Romance is an easy path for some, but for most it is a great many trials. Best wishes and take care.

Yes your are correct... Sad thing is the boys or men do feel same in their version... Now tell me who is correct and who is not...

It's funny because I'm a lot like that when I start falling for a woman, but I can't find one to fall for.. you just have to look open your heart and hope you found a good one.. they are out there.. it's just people have a hard time picking or finding the good ones.

But is does exists. But two facts : - must be truly emmotionnaly mature, and both sides. - not everyone is made for this kind of love. May be you are, may be you are not. Because it is a give and get, and some want what they are not ready to give.

There's a lot of them out there, but unfortunately a lot of women say the same exact thing and then find it suffocating and boring,as said not all but most of them

Hmm... Well, I guess you haven't met me then. Or my father. Or my mentor We exist, but you won't find us without looking, sweetheart. And you need more than looks to get us

Bada booii

I do all of those things… except remember the small things. I am a squirrel.

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