Struggling to not “annoy people”

Question

I tend to a) misread social cues b) make the wrong “jokes” (hurtful accidentally) c) social anxiety d) lack confidence e) don’t trust myself

I’m a classic super introvert that masks as a (at times) confident and capable extrovert while internally overthinking and panicking everything (I love books and words and etymology)

How do I be honest and accept myself and be forward in who I am (flaws and all)

Like is there a way to label myself as a fixer-upper or a DIY project 😂😂 like He’s close he just needs some work

Do we need to bring puka shell necklaces back

More like pukE ASHELL 🐚 necklaces amirite ladies (idk I just hate overly tan men they scare me I am smol and not strong 💪🏻 I can run tho)

Mitch · Accepted Answer

The best way to describe it is I struggle to find a balance between passive and agressive…. I’m either overly explosive and competitive for the situation (like picking a very specific brand of PB for your PB&J no thanks skippy) or just regret and feel shame for not “saving the day” which I should realistically know is impossible but I expect of myself especially since I’m such a bundle of energy and words

Ana · Answer

I can relate ("overthinking and panicking everything (I love books and words and etymology)") but I can't always mask as extrovert. Anyways...

How can you find a balance?
First, look at what you like and what you dislike about yourself. What bothers you? What are the roots for that behavior and for you to be bothered. Then, understand what you can do to change.
Not sure I was of good help but haha

Joy · Answer

I don’t have nothing normal to say to help you, I just wanted to say how much I admire your words. 
No fixing needed. You are cool

Isaiah · Answer

Have you tried not giving a f*ck?

Shu-shu · Answer

I think all that comes from the lacking confidence as you said, that's the root of it 
As for building confidence it's not like a thing you can just check off and complete, it is a part of you and it has to be built up gradually with time. I would recommend therapy and getting to know yourself better 
There's a lot of videos and articles out there on how to build self esteem, be less caring of what others think, etc.
Also I think physical exercise would help but it's not everything of course mentality is most important.
There's also a thing called rejection therapy which I find very interesting. A guy did 100 days of putting himself in situations where he might get rejected and through the process he built his confidence up 
So yeah there's many routes you can take but it's gonna be gradual and there will be ups and downs it's a journey. I myself am not the most confident person so I'm working on myself too

Struggling to not “annoy people”

Relationshipadvice Community

I don’t have nothing normal to say to help you, I just wanted to say how much I admire your words. No fixing needed. You are cool

Have you tried not giving a f*ck?

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