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romance
1y

Need to vent about my first Boo "love"...

For the first time ever, I actually met someone on Boo who I felt a real connection with, he was from NH and I'm from Maine, not too bad for a short long distance right? Right on the boarder 2 hours away from me, meeting halway for our first date. Things went so well, we were falling in love (or so I thought), wanting to say those 3 words but wanted to wait till our second date and then pop the question to start dating, so much conversation, energy and effort went into this for almost 2 months, then he showed his true colors, started being judgemental towards me, trying to change who I am, trying to turn me into the girl he sees in his head as his dream girl, sorry to say but IM NOT HER!! Even commented on my weight and thinks i should lose some of it!!! He's never dated before, I was gonna be his first, we're both the same age, he had a sudden outburst couple days ago, and just called it "a bad day", no more like controlling and toxic, I will not stand for another toxic relationship, I will end that so fast... it just hurts so much I built this amazing connection with someone just for them to destroy it all over their ego. It's not fair to me, he knew the type of person I was when we started dating, and he continued anyway... I really want a real relationship where a man will love me for who i am and not try to change me and let me change myself for me if thats what i want... I had to get this off my chest, thanks for reading... Anyone else have a similar experience on Boo? (edited)

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1y

Was his name Jeremy? Coz i think we dated the same guy.... Wahahaha I swear these covert Narcs are really on their A game in the begining.. their fake love... fake caring... its all a mask... 😅 till it starts coming off slowly as time passes

1y

I don't want to judge too hard, but having no experience with dating at 32 really points to something gone wrong with his social interactions, I'm sorry you had to go through that

1y

Ok first of looked through your profile and you look gorgeous. Also like you said only change if you want to. That said even though it hurts be glad you dodged that bullet. 2 months can feel like a lot of time but luckily it ended before it got serious. I wish you luck and succes in future endeavours.

1y

Please, please, please tell me that you're no longer in contact with him. I know it hurts and I am really sorry it happened to you. But 2 months is way better than two years. You just dodged a bullet.

1y

Hmmm 🤔 no, nobody tired to change my appearance. I think that amazing connection at the beginning doesn’t mean anything, because it’s just first impression nothing more, and people feel interest about each other and then interest vanishes when person is already “theirs” so when it doesn’t vanish and when more you talk more you like each other, this is better connection

1y

Well... he does not sound so bright...

1y

I'm pretty sure I once read this article about dating that said, in big lines, even if all goes well, once you actually meet and spend time with each other you may or may not get along or get annoyed easily by silly things since your like... Pheromones? Not sure what the word was anymore but those things just clash and you feel a little alienated by it causing a conflict in emotions where you want it to work but unconsciously can't make it work and feel very frustrated about it without knowing where it comes from. So even though you might believe you are compatible the physicality of it does not always follow.

1y

Btw... @Meghan thank you for sharing your story... I swear many of us would blame ourself and be in the spiral of "what did I do wrong" but when stories like these are shared... we remind each other that we aren't crazy... and they "they" were thr problem. I appreciate you. You deserve so much love and peace.... 😘

1y
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1y

Eh um? That's not toxic more like he lied about what he's into and thought maybe he could turn you into some random fantasy girl that he keeps dreaming about. Lol needs more context cause how does he treat people like his relatives or family besides you? Eh this doesn't seem new to me

1y

Now it's time to change the filter. Metamorphosis is a difficult process to tackle and for those who you choose to take that journey with you MUST be good in areas of support. Shack it off....don't let any yokes or chains continue to weigh at you with this experience that is now behind us! A song to listen to is "Intentional" by Travis Greene. You need support that is intentional. #hugs (edited)

1y

unfortunately some will lie for so long that they sound genuine.It's good that you got away fast from that

1y

I'm sorry to hear that. It is frustrating certainly. However, better to learn about it at the start rather than much later. Keep looking and have faith. 🙂

1y

Why don't I meet someone 😞

1y

Had this in real life in the past, but not through here. - For some it's just a few dates, for others it's a year/three. In my case it was two years, and it was quite like you said it =/ - "Consistency in a relationship and honesty (to yourself)" is so important that it can't be understated. ...and when people don't have that, how can they even know what they want? You can only control yourself in a relationship. Not others, period.

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