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Aaron
Aaron

2y

ENFP

Scorpio

3
2

Ladies, Is Chivalry Dead?

Do you appreciate doors being opened, your date walking street-side, offering to pay for a date etc.? Or is it outdated and offensive?

13

28

Comment

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Kathleen

Kathleen

2y

INTJ

Leo

Totally alive :3 Communicate, offer nice things, but don't shove them on someone, because then the nice things come off as annoying, or might feel patronizing, not nice. Intention vs effect. Do it because you want to, not because you think you have to, or because you want something out of the exchange. The difference is often more noticeable than you might realize, and makes a big difference in the reaction. It's "it makes me happy to do this for you" VS "I'm obligated to do this because I'm a dude" And if your getting a negative reaction, maybe consider the WAY you're doing it. For example; Cutting in front of someone to open the door is just gonna make someone wana step on the backs of your heels out of sheer spite. A polite, "Let me get that for you" or something THEN if they're cool with it cutting in front of them to get the door if someone's carrying something, or holding the door when you were in front to begin with feels more thoughtful, and considerate. And if you're gonna play gallant, treat everyone that way. Opening a car door for a lady was big before specifically because 1: the doors used to need to be manually unlocked on each side, and 2: opening the door for exit is from carriage days because heels and tiny carriage steps=need help down or maybe face plant into the dirt. Hitting the electric unlock button, and trying not to park in a puddle is now basically the same thing, it's just not flashy. And the difference in tech makes for a difference in what's potentially awkward. So perhaps consider that too :3 And keep in mind some chick's like to do that stuff too because it makes em happy. So let them enjoy being nice and protective sometimes too! :D

2

1

Reply

shiiistheone

shiiistheone

2y

ESFJ

Pisces

2
1

It is much appreciated in my own opinion.

3

0

Reply

Lysa

Lysa

2y

INFP

6
7

I would love that, not outdated at all

3

0

Reply

MELC

MELC

2y

INFP

Sagittarius

6
5

I think you've just gotta be mindful you're not being patronising

2

0

Reply

J

J

2y

ESFJ

Virgo

6
7

I would still love that

2

0

Reply

evelyn ✨

evelyn ✨

2y

INFP

Libra

5
4

Nowadays I see any attempts at "chivalry" as controlling. It's outdated. You can be kind and helpful without misogyny.

0

8

Reply

Kate

Kate

2y

ISTJ

Leo

8
7

Uhmmmm its the sexiest thing on earth and I would brag to all my friends about my man I found one that good.

1

0

Reply

Kimberly

Kimberly

2y

ISTJ

Leo

6
5

I believe chivalry is still there. It's very rare. Those things are nice (edited)

1

0

Reply

Erin

Erin

1y

ESFJ

Aquarius

8
7

I think its great unfortunately it doesn't happen often in the dating world now

0

0

Reply

Skylism

Skylism

2y

INFP

Capricorn

8
7

Sure thing, I hope it's still alive and kicking. If it's a sign of showing we go out of our ways to genuinely care about others, neither a forced play nor games in dating/relationships.

0

0

Reply

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