How are men so lonely nowadays? And women too? Is there a way to match all of us?

That's perfectly good answer.

This is a massive generalization, and it doesn't sound very accurate either.

Women with high standards is only half the problem. The other half is low quality men. The average guy is lazy, self centered, and brain fried from porn. The self centered part they share in common with the women.

@Luke you do have a point regarding to porn, it provides easy sexual gratification to men. " Self centered" is an interesting point, this in men is something innate of our nature or is it a reaction to the despising of masculinity?

👍

@Diego I think both our nature and the despising of masculinity play a role towards self centeredness. Western society theses days highly encourages self centeredness. Everything must cater to you. You don't better yourself to meet society, instead society changes to meet you. No effort from you, instead you deserve everything for existing. Relationships on the other hand are a wake-up call to self centered people. When yourself is the focus, meeting your desires, chasing your happiness, no one person is good enough. Relationships are about a shared life together. Both need to sacrifice and put effort towards it for it to work, and so it just doesn't work today.

@Luke I totally agree with you with a small add on, before men was "forced" to work for society (real masculinity) and whoever failed to his commintment was shamed, the lack of a positive role model (responsibility of man and woman) tilted the balance towards the losing of this masculine treat. As you said today's times shift has abandoned the utility of shaming.

@Diego yes absolutely.

@Luke let me ask you? Who do you think make their own standars harder to meet, men or women?

@Diego tough question. I want to say women, but I'm coming at it with a male perspective. Men tend to have lower standards, but I also think men tend to have more wrong standards. A woman can meet those standards easier, but at a greater risk to herself, and in alot of cases at a cost to her dignity. Women have higher standards, but the standards are more correct. I'm speaking on average, there's exceptions. Women call men to responsibility and maturity. Women face these things earlier then men physically. Men rise to the call, and take on the responsibility, and they mature through it. That's not easy, especially for today's men.

@Luke and it seems you are giving the answer by saying we have lower standards, lower standard easy to meet could be understood (I am not saying it is right). Men are women are different so having different standards would be normal. Now you say wrong and right standards. Calling for responsibility and maturity to a man is a standard? Because this could be asked from your partner or your father or any other positive patternal role model. From your perspective what would be a positive and negative standard in both men and women?

@Diego Yes a responsible and mature man is indeed a standard women have for men, and yes you can be called to maturity and responsibility from a role model or parent figure, but there's a difference between responsibility for yourself, and responsibility for others. I don't think anyone is truely mature until there is someone in their life they view as more important then themselves, whom they are responsible for. This would be their children. When you're single, you show responsibility for yourself, when you date and intend to marry, you are showing your willingness to be responsible for others. I think women by their nature have a easier time with responsibility for others. It's a standard a man should have for a woman as well, but women tend to naturally be that way as the child bearer. Again there's always exceptions. I think a man with the wrong standards is looking for a woman who will never require him to grow up, and be responsible for anyone other then himself. I'd have to think alittle longer as to a woman with the wrong standards, but honestly it may be very similar. Looking for a man that doesn't require responsibility from her. Very good questions. I have to think on it. What do you think?

@Luke ok I see what you mean. I understood wrong and right like something you should or shouldnt look in another person for you to want to be with that person not something in that person that makes you or not improve yourself. I agree you must learn to be responsible for yourself because this will proved you are able to take care of others and having the willingness to do it for others (ergo self sacrifice) is something to be learned too but what I dont agree with is that you need "someone" to mature because someone can just be society, your family, even a stranger, and you must lend your shoulder to carry the weight of the world together.

@Diego yeah that's a good point, you can mature in the same way with responsibility towards society, family, and strangers. I just think a person who is able to truely do that is a rare person, and the majority of people learn it through responsibility towards the family they create.

@Luke I get you. You could say that if you dont have a positive masculine role model in your life you will never learn responsibility. And if you start a project demanding this from you you either get a "express course" of this or you fail

😄

This sounds extremely incorrect from my personal experience and observation. Must be cultural differences.

@Snags everything i said applies to western culture, other places are doing ok

@kyle not so sure about that. Every woman I know, has a husband/boyfriend who does nothing or very little, they're not with wealthy men. And men walk up to me all the time, to the point I avoid going out because I'm tired of it. I've also never dated anyone wealthy, I've always supported my partner, in most cases 100% support. So, very big generalization, that I have never observed to be true outside of movies and places like LA or New York City. I've never actually met ANYONE who wanted to date someone because of their wealth.

This is it. Well said.

@Snags our differences in experience on this is crazy. Every guy I know who's married is a high quality man with a great job and alot to give towards his family. The more useless guys I know are the ones in and out of relationships with women, frustrated at how difficult a time they are having at it. I think the real answer isn't so much nessacrially that the guy is incredibly wealthy starting out, but rather that he shows the work ethic and ambition to work and support a family, and gets there because of his love for his partner.

@Luke "high quality," I will NEVER understand people labeling others as "high" or "low" quality people. As a humanitarian, that just makes me furious.

@Snags humans are all equal in intrinsic human value. However, you cannot deny there is a difference between someone who betters society and all those around them through hard work and selflessness, vs someone lazy, unhygienic, selfcenterd, abusive, destructive to themselves and all those around them.

Nobody is good enough for eachother.

@Luke I mean look at OP. Knowing nothing about her other than her profile I'm so not interested, because it looks like she put in 0 effort. And she might look at my profile and go "dude is ugly AF". But you know, we could just date and not be lonely.

@Will yeah, could just date and find out there's so much more to either of you then you ever could of thought. Problem is, it takes effort to know someone like that.

@Luke maybe if people could put in more effort into themselves and be humble people would want each other

@Aurora there're also tastes in everything

@Aurora yeah most definitely. Effort towards yourself to be someone another person would even want to date and form a relationship with. Problem is people respond to that like "I'm not going to try and be someone I'm not to please someone else." Which is a misunderstanding. Don't gotta pretend to be someone you aren't, you just have to show atleast some level of selflessness and responsibility.

@Luke The biggest problem is people aren't honest about what they really want and are looking for ,it's alot of fake people out there

@Catherine aren't honest, yeah there's alot of people like that forsure. However there's also alot of people that just don't really know what it is they really want, even if they think they do. Know what I mean? A relationship sounds good in their heads, but then the responsibility it involves doesn't. Also with the risk that's involved with trust.

Abandon all hope my friend. All is left is to open good beer, sit somwhere nice and deal with fact we gonna be alone. When you deal with this it will be easier to live:)

@Jared nah, bro, why giving up? Just talk to women more and more, eventually will find mutual sympathy

@Всеволод that will be desperation. Because of something like this you will stuck with someone who you dont lov ebut you will be in relationship because it will be first person who liked you/show mercy/pity you back

@Jared Then it is problem with self-esteem. You don't choose the one who pity you, you choose the one YOU like and then look if this person likes you too. If not - go next. Also why do you think those relationships are bad? Is it mutual? There's a sympathy? Then what is difference between this one and "normal" relationship? Self-esteem, king, self-esteem, work on it hard.

@Всеволод thats right, but developing self esteem requires completly diffirent approach. You can builmid as long as you want, but nowadays it can be crushed in seconds

@Jared Then build an indestructible fundament. Let only you compare yourself previous to yourself present and make conclusions what to improve.

@Всеволод there is nothing indestructible on this Word. And listening to words of "success coach" will only hurt people.

@Jared Don't loose hope,just be honest about what you really want and keep looking

@Catherine the worst thing men can do is Beeing honest

@Jared being honest will give honest reply. I don't know a thing about dating or looking beautiful or above average guy but you might find someone if you try again and again like that science experiment in our school days. All the best , may you find someone to share that beer and life with.

@anant Sagar negi trying again is good when you trying to set jigsaw puzzles. Until i wont feel connection there is no sense to be honest.

@Jared yeah, I could go with beer instead 😅

@Ron see? Go to pub garden, order a beer, sit in shady area and enjoy:) noone told you to not Look at the girls:P

@Jared thanks for the idea 😆

@Ron your welcome. You will stop to be lonely after you will find pleasure of finishing new set of super hard legos without Hearing " why you buying Kids toys! You not taking me anywhere"

C'est toujours le stéréotype "une belle peut trouver facilement, pas une moche". Peut-être que c'est ça le souci aussi : vouloir quelqu'un absolument "amazing".

@Élise ben si je te comprend , la realitée est que une image vaut souvent mile mots . Je te dirais bien que tu est sensible et intelligente , mais avec un profile de 20 mots c est difficile de complimenter autre choses que l apparance . Serais-ce aussi possible que pour etre attirer par un/une partenaire il faut etre attirer par quelque choses ? Enfin je n ai pas la reponse , je sais juste que le concept de beautée est tres different selon l individus . La plus part des modeles ne sont pas tellement pour m attirer .

Un commentaire en francais perdu dans une foule anglaise mdr

@Rachael une bouteille à la mer 🤣🤣

@Adri hahahah ouii 🤣🤣🤣🤣

*reads this statement from his bed after a long day at work*

:(

Because expectations. How many Times did you hear: i Wish my boyfriend will be like you"?

God bless Jordan Peterson I'd be willing to trade Joe Biden Lori Lightfoot and Nancy Pelosi for him run that by the prime Minister and let me know 🤣