Boo
1mo

Getting to know someone

After you’ve lived a little and loved a little, the talking stage starts to feel different but experience teaches you that connection isn’t built on chemistry alone, it’s built on curiosity. That’s why I’ve realised I don’t really enjoy conversations that begin with “tell me about yourself” and then… silence. Maybe it’s just me, but I’m not here to perform. I’m not auditioning for someone’s attention. If you reached out because you wanted to get to know me, then get to know me. Ask me questions. Wonder about the things that shaped me. I’ll happily answer them, and I’ll be just as curious about you. I’ve always thought that getting to know someone isn’t about proving you’re worth choosing. It’s about two people discovering whether they genuinely enjoy discovering each other. In a world that seems to value convenience more and more, I think curiosity has become a rare kind of romance.

33 votes

Universe Community

The universe community, chat, and discussion.

1.8M SOULS

1mo

I understand your point and curiosity is great, but we have to stand up for ourselves. For men, who almost always have to take the first step, it's not easy (especially if one is shy or self-esteem isn't at 100%, since many are on these apps precisely because meeting people in other ways is very difficult or almost impossible for them). Sometimes we feel like we're shooting in the dark with our eyes closed, trying to hit the target. The classic 'tell me about yourself' is not laziness or lack of interest, it's an exploratory probe! It's a safe first step to find a thread to pull. An interested man will use your answer as a map to know what to ask next and where to take the conversation. The deep and specific questions you ask seem perfect to me... but maybe for the second round, when we've already survived the 'hello.' Now, that said: if you respond to that 'tell me about yourself' opening up the conversation, and he doesn't know how to take the next step or continue the conversation... there I completely agree with you and I can't defend them anymore.

1mo

The best conversations don't feel like interviews.. they feel like two people slowly unfolding each other's stories. That's where real chemistry begins

1mo

I agree, what is said to the right word?

7d

Curiosity has become a rare kind of romance” — that line got me. There’s a huge difference between someone waiting for their turn to talk and someone who genuinely wants to understand how you became you. So, practicing what you preach… what’s something about you people rarely think to ask, but you wish they would? 🙂

1mo

"Tell me about yourself" is rehearsed.

Meet New People

50,000,000+

DOWNLOADS