Jagat

Psychology

Nvcommunication

nvcommunication

I first heard the term on a workshop with the (late) Robert Gonzales on NVCacademy several years ago. And it made a lot of sense to me. That in our childhood, expressing specific needs/feelings, felt overwhelmingly dangerous to the point of obliteration.


And despite us growing up, the feelings from that periode of our lives linger on - rapidly draining our emotional/cognitive batteries if and when we start to get close.


To me, expressing that I have an important need, that goes critically unmet especially in close relationships, is terrifying. It is a specific kind of dread, and noticing that it felt closer to a fear lf annihilation, has made it easier to self-connect. That it is the feelings of an inner child, and not 'really' a sign of imminent doom.

Having worked on NVC with chosen family for a decade, there have been progress, to the point where I couldn't really imagine expressing my needs as clearly. Nevertheless, I still feel a strong wave of dread and anxiety, that takes me many hours to process, when I express my unmet needs.


Wanted to share, as it has been a helpful perspective; and supported me and us be more compassionate and gentle with ourselves. 🦎🌼❤️🩵

Fear of annihilation/obliteration when openly and directly expressing our needs?

Kuring munggaran ngadangu istilah ieu dina workshop sareng (almarhum) Robert Gonzales di NVCacademy sababaraha taun ka pengker. Sareng éta ngajantenkeun seueur rasa pikeun kuring. Bahwa dina masa kanak-kanak urang, ngungkapkeun kabutuhan/raos anu khusus, karasa pisan bahaya nepi ka titik obliteration.

Sareng sanajan urang tumuwuh, raos ti periode éta dina kahirupan urang tetep aya - gancang nguras batré émosional/kognitif urang lamun sareng nalika urang mimiti deukeut.

Pikeun kuring, ngungkapkeun yén kuring gaduh kabutuhan anu penting, anu henteu dipenuhi sacara kritis khususna dina hubungan deukeut, mangrupikeun hal anu matak sieun. Éta mangrupikeun jinis kahariwang anu khusus, sareng nyadar yén éta karasa langkung deukeut ka kahariwang annihilation, parantos ngajantenkeun langkung gampang pikeun nyambung ka diri sorangan. Éta mangrupikeun raos budak jero, sareng sanés 'sacara nyata' tanda doom anu bakal datang.

Sanggeus damel dina NVC sareng kulawarga anu dipilih salami sapuluh taun, parantos aya kamajuan, nepi ka titik dimana kuring henteu tiasa ngabayangkeun ngungkapkeun kabutuhan kuring sacara jelas. Sanajan kitu, kuring masih ngarasa gelombang kuat kahariwang sareng cemas, anu nyandak kuring sababaraha jam pikeun ngolah, nalika kuring ngungkapkeun kabutuhan kuring anu henteu dipenuhi.

Kuring hoyong ngabagi, sabab éta mangrupikeun perspektif anu ngabantosan; sareng ngadukung kuring sareng urang pikeun langkung welas asih sareng lembut ka diri sorangan. 🦎🌼❤️🩵

Kahariwang ngeunaan annihilation/obliteration nalika sacara terbuka sareng langsung ngungkapkeun kabutuhan urang?

we should care more about the accurate evalyation of context than the use of NVC. without clear assessment .. nvc just becomes lying either by omission or by indirect validation

generic analysis is underestimated

urang kedah langkung paduli kana evaluasi konteks anu akurat tibatan ngagunakeun NVC. tanpa penilaian anu jelas .. nvc ngan saukur janten bohong boh ku pangaluaran atanapi ku validasi henteu langsung

analisis generik dianggap remeh

A Boo community for meeting other Nvcommunication enthusiasts.

Nvcommunication Community

Kahariwang ngeunaan annihilation/obliteration nalika sacara terbuka sareng langsung ngungkapkeun kabutuhan urang?

analisis generik dianggap remeh