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Dear diary....
Three days in a row I've had overly good days.... (edited)

Meh
Just feeling super duper blah today ๐ฎโ๐จ๐
Just a page from my journal
Some people arrive as if they've lost their way. They find my door, step into my little corner of the world, and linger for a while. They ask questions, share stories, and study me with quiet curiosity. Others never ask at allโthey simply fill the silence with their own assumptions. For a moment, Iโฆ read more
๐ถ๐ปโโ๏ธโโก๏ธ
Have you ever noticed that when a connection with someone truly ends, they seem to disappear from your world... Even if you live in the same area, you hardly ever bump into them anymore. Perhaps it's because your paths are no longer aligned. Your journey has taken a different direction, and youโฆ read more
A bit attention-seeking
it's hard when you have a short attention span (adhd)

The Night Everything Slowed Down ๐
It was two in the morning, and the city seemed to be breathing more slowly than usual. I sat by a floor-to-ceiling glass window on the second floor of a quiet brewery, a half-finished glass of wine resting between my hands. Somewhere behind me, a jazz saxophone melted into the low hum ofโฆ read more
Epiphany
I was reading the news today, which I've been avoiding, and had my usual crying at reading terrible things happening. I've thing popped out the most. Seeing a host of a kid show, show up politically to create awareness and action to protect children in ice detention, made me feel hopeful andโฆ read more

๐คฃLeft work Super early๐

Dear diary ....
Making the bed makes me want to get violent ๐ I have Been buying comforter blankets for years as putting a doona cover on a doona turns me into a totally different person , but I find myself looking at a nice yellow flower doona cover and it got me thinking is it worth the stress . Light thisโฆ read more

What are 3 things you're grateful for?
Great Rising Lovelies & minions๐โฎ๏ธ I am grateful to be overwhelmed by all the wonderful things I have to create at once๐ฅฐ I am grateful to be able to create them damn near anywhere on earth ๐ I am grateful I can do anything I put my mind and hands to๐ฆ๐ท๐พ
.
I've cut off contact with everyone, I don't talk to anyone anymore. I'm spiraling downwards into something, I'm not exactly sure what it is. my goals vary from day to day, but it's usually just to fast (not eat) and to save money. all I do is work and sleep, which I'm content with. I don't enjoy myโฆ read more
The House That No Longer Had Her Name๐
She had said no to herself a thousand times. No when her fingers hovered over his name. No when loneliness disguised itself as hope. No when memory arrived wearing the perfume of old promises. She had spent days gathering the shattered pieces of herself from places he had left broken. Daysโฆ read more
Update:
My mom was in town with my sister and her boys. I taught them to play poker and shoot my dad's old pellet gun. I tried showing them Major Payne but my sister objected due to a lot more swearing than I recall being in that movie. We made smores and mom baked some stellar cookies ๐ Anyway, it'sโฆ read more
Weekend,
Ah this is again one of the many weekends where I need to sort things of my work, yet it's rainy so I like it. Makes me feel very comfortable. Wondering if it were sunny, I would be hating it cause it wouldn't feel like a day I have work off. Can't it be so that every weekend it's cloudy? Thatโฆ read more
Goodnight
i usually write on my journal and listen to music before i go to bed. ๐ it keeps me more clean and i can connect to my inner self even more๐

The one hardest to love
Are usually the one who need it the most.
Dear Myself
Please... Forgive urself. Forgive ur past. Deal with it. You have travelled far away. You've hangout alone. You ate alone. You have done everything alone. Forgive urself and start to grow up. Plss.

Journaling to calm my nerves
Wrote a letter to my future self

EVERYTHING LOOKS DIFFERENT I DONT LIKE IT !!!!
Dear diary ๐ผโ๏ธ Decided to change my room around , first time in my life IV decided to sleep on the other side of the bed , it's the same room but it looks different I DONT LIKE IT !! but I'm forcing myself to get used to it because of my autism I don't like changes...and I need changes inโฆ read more

Keeping myself occupied
Journaling is somehow keeping my thoughts organized. Please note that I am new to this so I am not sure if my spreads are in correct order๐คฃ (edited)
Auntie Toris daily diary.
I'm seeing a therapist.... His advice, surround myself with positive people . Sir , I have positive people in my life , I'm the negative energy in this group , bring in the Sage watch me climb the walls b*tch .. 12the Nov 2025 ๐โ๏ธ

My journal/sketchbook/reading activities this past week:
- Started a dedicated journal for developing financial literacy, rooting out money wounds, discovering my values and how to deal with resources in accordance with those values (how to balance communal wellness with my own wellness) - Doodled with the guidance of some pinterest tutorials -โฆ read more
Sad when you crying for help to you're own family and they the first one's to turn their back on you.
#TorisJournal 2022 6 Jan
I...I just want friends ....I'm 30 this year ....I have probably 3 people in my life I could call to have a BBQ..go fishing with...camping ...a day out ...go beach ...ect like I grew up doing with my dads side of the family / friends .. but no my friends live like a hour or two away or make upโฆ read more

Journaling? Not today says Luna๐ญ
#journaling #journal

2023 - day 1 - the creep
Male : wyd tonight Me: sleeping most likely what are you doing ? Male : thinking about you .... Me :

#TorisJournal 2023 13jan
I created a POF ( dating site ) account Update - I regret this (edited)

#TorisJournal 2023 - 3rd Jan
So today ... I got bullied took me by surprise got upset a little But that's OK cause I had plenty of sweet beautiful people stand up for me which made me feel safe and loved and cared for #AppreciatePeople #LoveThemAll ๐ฅนโค
About wind and hurricanes.
Shamanic practice is on my experience a very very personal path. There is not a specific instruction manual of how and why you contact with nature energies and other realms. You dont need be a mystic, or have a previous specific degree or knowledge, because a real shaman dont want or even cared ofโฆ (edited) read more

Triggering time
Trauma happens, then later on things happen to trigger flashbacks, like as if I'm back there again, trauma again. I'm working thru it without therapy this time, i think I'm on a healthy track. Only i can hold myself accountable, only i can protect myself. It's hard. I dissociate often, โฆ (edited) read more


Dear diary!
The fact people feel they have the right to treat you like sh!+ because their not getting what they want or wanted . Its amusing to me cause it shows they want full control of everything. Than try and guilt trip you into believing their sorry ? shows that person is a BUCKET of red narcissisticโฆ read more

#Torisjournal 2023 - 7th Jan
Today....can....fok right off .
!ยก
I hadn't used the app for a while ๐ Apologies if you sent me a message and I didn't reply ๐๐ปโโ๏ธ I'm back ๐ ใใใใใญ
#TorisJournal 2023 16th Jan
I'm just over it . People automatically act like I can't do things without help , and Im deadset over it iv looked after myself since the age of 7 and now we're all grown up y'all are looking down on me ?! (edited)

Every Saint has a past. Every Sinner has a future.
Are we really free to choose our destiny? Are we really aware that even the most small and simple choice we do, can alter and move the flow of timelines? Where this choices has lead us to? as planet? as collective? What timeline are we helping to push ( unconsciously ) as Humanity and induced byโฆ read more
Dear journal- 2023 - 23 feb
Dear sam and my sons father - I donโt mind being a villain in your story because you are crack head's in mine. #๐
2023 - quote journal- 2nd January ๐ #quote

#TorisJournal ( 2020 ) some date
2020 - went to my now ex bestfriends house started drinking we both got drunk we were laughing and laughing.... randomly.... Ex bestie - I F#cked Thomas the other night ...pauses knowing she just foked up Me : laughs ok cool cool Next morning Ex bestie - morning Me : so what made you f#ck myโฆ (edited) read more

#ToriJournal 2023 4th Jan
Today , Today I made a video on YouTube, it took 4 hours for it to upload for some reason but I started feeling down about it but all of it changed once I got 3 likes ...within seconds I felt like a youtube princess ๐ ....I broke my foundation .. I had an anxiety attack .. but I made the makeupโฆ (edited) read more

#TorisJournal 2023 11feb
Dear journal โจ๏ธ I'm abit annoyed .... at myself really, I feel as if I can make my life bigger and better but I'm just so drained i feel dead ..... I feel like people around me are stealing my energy I can literally feel the depression happening #tired #drained #depression #overeverything

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