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Universes
Posted Thursday, October 19, 2023
1y
ESTP
Aquarius
What's goin on
I've been a bit greedy. And biased. And I'm basically losing my mind amid the tornado of bs I've spun for myself. It's tough to not belong anywhere sometimes. To not belong to anybody and run away from those that belong to you. It's been a long while of not getting heard, not being included, not including and self excluding. My people are my people but they're so far away right now.. who I have close I can't seem to bear for reasons unknown and here I am... losing myself in greed and solitude. They're all fuzking with me and my brain seems unable to unfuck itself to maintain my sanity. This is a messy post cuz I just wanna get heard for a lil bit and tell you how much I wanna scream in pain, punch walls in angst and cry while I let myself feel. I don't let myself feel much anymore. I just count. Numbers. It was all about the numbers rather than the people. Theres only three left in this world for whom it's not about the numbers. I need to go now and stop crying cuz invalidated my feeling is what I do best cuz I can hardly ever process them for what reasons I dunno. I need a therapist. And a trainer to teach me bboying lol
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