Why do most men insist on doing things alone?

Question

Is it a macho thing?
To prove independence of one’s self?

I can respect one’s independence.

I’m more of a social person who likes to teach others what I know.
The sang:
Give a man a fish and he eats for a day.
Teach a man to fish and he eats for life.

Macho thing? Independence thing? Loner thing?
Something else?
What’s everyone’s view on this?

Chris Watkins · Accepted Answer

I like my own company. I like to do what I want to do when I want, how I want to do it. I dislike having to compromise all the time. I am slightly introverted, and run out of social battery, so need time to turn off my intra-personal skills and ignore others.

Mark · Answer

You have to be able to take care of yourself first before you may be allowed to take care of others. Weak people can't provide support. That's my stance on it.

Jordan · Answer

Convience, planning, schedule, spontaneous.
I do random food adventures by myself, I invite friends but people have jobs and families so it’s more of picking and choosing who you want to spend your time with.

A Yogi · Answer

Thats a gross generalisation.

Some men do prefer doing things solo. But many men like doing thing in a group.

Some of the reasons that you have mentioned could easily apply to women as well, but definitely more men than women.

It could be all of them, it could be none of them.

It's also down to upbringing since childhood, inate characteristics, opportunities and capabilities

Josh · Answer

I can definitely understand how one was raised being a major influence.

I grew up in private military schools.
Pain and give up weren’t options, but teamwork was mandatory in nearly all situations but survival. So, working alone has always been foreign to me.
That’s what got me thinking about this question.

David U. · Answer

There are many factors, everything from a guy needing to prove something to someone even if it's just a mental accomplishment that only he will know about, like I showed him I know how to fix this, and sometimes it's rooted in toxic masculinity given through generations of what it is to be a man. I know those are only two examples in the bigger scheme of things, but they do play a pivotal role in much of our lives as men.

Jesse Cruz · Answer

To be honest I'd rather suffer alone than to assimilate and lose myself trying to be welcomed into whatever other people are trying to do. Rather die in ignominity winning my own battles than lose my soul among people who do not want to go any further in life.

Rob · Answer

Depending how a man was raised or brought up. A lot of men are taught to man up. A lot of men don't know how to communicate or Express themselves properly due to how they were raised.

Carlos · Answer

As someone said: It has many dependencies. It could be because one genuinely enjoys doing thing on his own (most of the time), accomplishing stuff the way and pace one wants instead of having to adhere to more pressure or someone painfully slower and less experienced. Either sometimes one is an inconvenient, or others are (again, not always and this part doesn't have to do with one's sex).

My personal experience is another side: It's not to prove anything, that's just how we roll. Everyone must be a functional member of society, proving one is independent is like a teen proving he/she goes potty in the WC. Okay, and? You're expected to do that anyways (forgive my crass example). It's not just men, mind you, everyone needs a degree of independence.

Now, if you mean the more emotional part of it. One: we usually prefer to deal with our feelings on our own. To understand what we are going through and more importantly: how to solve it.

Another side of the same emotional coin is the fact that when we open up, wether by other dudes (surprisingly, not that common as one may thing) or women. Our moments of weakness can and more often than not are used against us.

Why do most men insist on doing things alone?

Psychology Community

You have to be able to take care of yourself first before you may be allowed to take care of others. Weak people can't provide support. That's my stance on it.

Convience, planning, schedule, spontaneous. I do random food adventures by myself, I invite friends but people have jobs and families so it’s more of picking and choosing who you want to spend your time with.

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