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Universes

Posted Thursday, June 20, 2024
10mo
INFJ
Libra
I HATE YOU
I sit here contemplating things that have yet to come to fruition. Hatred for the man I was, love for the man I'm becoming, and regrets for past mistakes. If not for you, I would have been better. Hmmm. They say to keep trying; it's just a matter of time. So I got up to meet the man in the mirror, but seeing him broke my heart. In tears, I reflect on the past and realize he never gave up, even when I should have. I hate you because you knew the truth but lied, saying it was for my own good and protection. I hate you because I struggle today, wondering why you left me alone. I hate you because you've moved on, leaving me to bask in shadows and wonder why the morning never came. I hate you for telling me fairy tales that led me to build castles in the air. I hate you for talking about a new life I know nothing about. You took me in gently, yet I became an outcast and a stranger for no reason. I hate you for saying that being hurt was part of everything. I walk out with my head high, smiling and shining even when I should be realistic and not live a lie. The other day, I came out but couldn't smile, so my heart bowed to buried memories. I cried, but you still didn't see me because it rained on me. As my world grows colder, I stand here wondering when the promises will become reality. I hate love, I hate you, I hate everything about you—your philosophy, your knowledge. You've moved on already, but it's fine. I know there's nothing special about me but darkness. I am only a little star in this space, trying every day to shine without help. If anyone ever notices my light, just know that I tried to shine, but the darkness wouldn't yield. And that's fine with me. MASON MIBUENENI UNUKE 01/01/2020
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