Your aggression and anger

Question

Lashing out at others? Think you are defending yourself online or one of your principles? Attacking others with your thoughts and words?
Do you default to kindness or do you default to some negative emotion?
People pick up on this in your communication.
This is a massive ick and a major reason why you are not making progress I your relationship goals. And it could be why your past experiences have failed. (We only truly fail when we stop trying)
You can relearn your default. Stop seeing what others do in a negative light. If you always feel attacked or you feel you need to be defensive, you may actually be suffering from undiagnosed depression. This could be a chemical or sociological depression.
You can learn to default to kindness. Each time you feel yourself defaulting to a negative emotion or you feel you must comment in a mean way stop yourself. Try and review the situation in a different light. Could you get wrong? Could you look deeper inside yourself to find why you reacted that way. Or just push away the dark and embrace the default of kindness and forgive and forget and move on.
Life is to short. Love deeply and with a default to being kind.
Good luck

Alyssa · Accepted Answer

@Kostas Don't hide in the dark. Come and see the light. 😂

Just wanna say, your comment is hidden. 🌚

Alexandre · Answer

I think what is important is to recognize negativity often has a source that originated somewhere else. Yes, people can behave in ways that are irritating for us. Should I enable the behavior by showing kindness? I highly doubt it. You would only enable undesirable behavior. I think two choices present themselves:

1. You walk away
2. You convey constructive criticism

In both cases, we should be mindful of the negative impact that interaction caused. Because it can spread like a cancer. Which is inevitable on such a public platform. The community starts great, just to crumble after the cumulated instances of trolling behavior, for example. The negativity persists, like a traffic jam after granny puts the break on a busy highway.
In that regard, the first one is the safest option. But if you have the mental resilience to engage in constructive criticism, by all mean, go ahead. What makes us strong is the exchange of knowledge. Our insights are valuable in a community. The real negative people are those who hold a certain ego-defensiveness. Not necessarily the ones sharing the criticism. When someone puts barriers to their own personal growth, it will inevitably create other problems. And I wouldn't encourage this with an enabling expression of kindness.

All this to say, yes. I think any sensical person would enjoy a harmonious community. But it is aging (two and a half years here, i think) and the effects are showing. I am naturally lowering my expectations over time. Because a continuous stream of disappointment isn't doing any good either.

Your aggression and anger

Selfawareness Community

@Kostas Don't hide in the dark. Come and see the light. 😂 Just wanna say, your comment is hidden. 🌚 (edited)

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