Alexandre

Posted Saturday, August 13, 2022

1y

INTP

5

4

Hypocritical

I think that title sums it up. Many don't seem to think about how that word applies to them when they're speaking. And I sure hope I think about it enough myself, as nobody is immune to human nature. They say things to look a certain way. To look caring in the posts and comments they share, etc. Apparently, they get rewared for it. But what happens if you share an opinion and it suggests removing something they had, for the greater good? It's funny to see them doing a full 180 degrees and fight back. The same applies when they don't understand someone's motivations. They're so used to get empty validation that they think they know better in every situation. That's the experience I had. All they have to say is "that's not nice," or "you can't say/do that." Well, it does not "sound" nice because it's irrelevant. It can even be counter-productive. But they function by looking at the appearances. "Let's not go under the surface, should we?" Let's say you end up in misery and can't feed yourself anymore. I'll be among the first to help you get out of that situation, given you deserve it. I'll shelter you. I'll feed you. But you will work your ass off and I'll sound really mean if you slack in the process. I offer help because I judged it won't be a waste, and you'll end up a well rounded individual. And that needs to be consistently proven through the process. But the people around merely claiming they care from afar (not to get involved!) will point fingers at how mean and inconsiderate I am in my actions. And a whole community will applaud them for sounding so much more righteous. And that feeds their ego. And I see that happening with my close ones. However, it's more about them not understanding how they help someone else's issues to persist. Because nobody dares to break codependencies patterns. If something doesn't work... well maybe it's about time to change something. It won't fix itself for no reason. I sometimes recognize those people when I'm arguing about topics like moralily. They're everywhere. I know when the interaction isn't about me and them, but rather them with their fictional audience. They spent their whole life in security. They never experienced hunger. They only know about first world problems and believe that's enough. What they fail to understand is, life isn't easy for everyone. Problems don't always fix themselves like they're used to. Because time fixes everything, right? And the process of getting out of a bad situation isn't meant to be fun. For me, it's obvious. You can't help someone if you never had to learn and help yourself at any point. If kind words is all you've got, then so be it. But don't interfere when someone actually stands up and breaks the cycle of passivity. That being said, many situations require professional help. Don't take random advice from stangers as a replacement to fix mental health issues. As I previously said, many are going to care more about their fictional audience than your well being. And they're simply not equipped to offer that help. Neither am I.