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Universes
Posted Sunday, September 25, 2022
2y
ENTP
Leo
1 Award
Wanting kids midway 40
Okay, so I still want to have kids. Quite a strong desire really. Yet, I've fairly often had feedback from women online that I should look closer to my own age group. The problem with that is that most women in my age group already think they're too old to have kids or simply don't want any. Also, the risk of complications for women getting pregnant after forty rises fairly sharply, so I do understand their reluctance. What do you think about this? Constructive comments quite welcome.
14
40
Comment
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Gerald
2y
ENFJ
Scorpio
Find a younger women. (Never thought I'd say that, as I've always wanted a women close to my age range.) But at the end of the day, you want kids. Women after 40 having kids is the exception, not the rule. So if you want to get married, and THEN find out she can't have kids, what are you even doing? Ignore advice online that contradicts your goals. It has nothing to do with what you want, and only applies the world the advice givers want to see. (Mine included.) I'm going to double check the research and statistics, and maybe I'm wrong. But if you only have 1 shot, and you want kids, go younger than 40. Nothing is guaranteed, but make sure that the odds are in your favor. I've seen older (very rich) women advising young women to date around when young, freeze their eggs, and have kids later in life. But their advice had nothing to do with the younger women's financial status, and they never bothered to mention that frozen eggs have, what, a 20% chance of taking? I don't think these older women had kids. So yeah, ignore stupid advice from stupid people, (Mine included) and do your own research to achieve your goals. Good luck, man.
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3
Reply
LJ
2y
ESTJ
Taurus
You are definitely in the minority. I think that women do still exist that want a family, it's just that there are less of them. I know for me, I run into a similar problem. I have one kid and I want more. Most men don't want children, have them and don't want more, and most are just looking for casual. I know for me, yes, I'm getting older but I'd still like to have more. Of course, risks can increase, but I am hoping and of course will talk with a doctor if the situation should arise. Also, from personal experience, I had a really easy pregnancy and enjoyed it. I had friends though that it was an opposite experience. They hated being pregnant and wouldn't do it again. I know women that they were so sick and some had complications that they decided they didn't want to go through a pregnancy again. Some women want to adopt and not be pregnant. It depends on what and how you define having kids.
2
0
Reply
Sarah
1y
ISTJ
Leo
Who says you need a partner to have a child , there's other ways via surrogate, adoption. If I wanted to have a child badly I would of done it via sperm donor there's no way I would wait and search for a suitable partner given my luck with relationships especially since we have a certain time period to have children. Since I don't want kids anyway it's not really an issue for me .
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