Justin

1mo

ISTJ
Cancer

Leagues Above

How do you manage to find people that are in your league in order to try to find a date? I only seem to find women on dating apps that are way above me looks wise and I'm unsure why that is. I'm just looking for a gal in my league, but it feels like every single one I come across is way too far out of my league... I know I'm not super ugly, but I don't want to waste someone's time if I know they're too good for me. I have really low standards, but still can't find anyone. Any advice?

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Stephen

1mo

ENFP
Taurus

8w7

8

7

Yeah that's how datting apps work, you are better going out and find people IRL you are better out there than in here

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Justin

1mo

ISTJ
Cancer

I get that, but I just wish I could find some girls that were in my league... I've been looking for a while, but haven't found a single one. It's just rough. I don't have the self confidence or the looks to go after all the women that are out of my league. In the end, dating apps just make me feel worse about myself.

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Ray

1mo

INTP
Cancer

6w7

6

7

@Justin That's just the pight of men these days, on dating apps; nobody goes for guys in their 20s unless they're Chads--but time will be on your side in your 30s+, especially if you make good use of your 20s working on yourself. 80-90% of guys (regardless of age, though) get very little traction on these apps; so best curb your expectations or ditch the apps altogether for now.

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Justin

1mo

ISTJ
Cancer

@Ray Oh, great... so I've gotta wait until I'm in my 30s to even get a smidgen of affection... you know, once all the women in my age group are done sleeping around and want a man to settle down with. If things keep going how they're going, I'm going to end up offing myself before I even reach that point. So I guess it doesn't really matter either way... thanks for the advice anyway.

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Ray

1mo

INTP
Cancer

6w7

6

7

@Justin Hang in there & one day you can get a girlfriend of any age you want. Men hit their prime just as women are exiting theirs. You'll have your day--but society is just constituted thus, to where women are inherently valued from birth, but men are expected to make something of themselves. I didn't enjoy my 20s, & didn't have a clue why, either--but knowledge is power, & you can get an edge if you don't worry about chasing women. Just wait & they'll chase you in time.

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1

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Justin

1mo

ISTJ
Cancer

@Ray Yeah... but I don't want to build myself up in value just to be used and discarded. I just want a single person to care for. Why must that be just so hard to find? And by the time I'm in my 30s, I'm going to have lost all my hair and ill be even more ugly.... I'm just going to get back to work here. Just ended up making myself sad. Sorry.

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