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Universes
Posted Friday, December 27, 2024
22d
INFP
Gemini
Ignoring me after a fight
I was talking to a man that I met here and he chose to ignore me instead of solving the problem. This is like the 4th time he did this, I told him about it before and that it bothers me but he did nothing about it. If you upset me my feelings will not be ignored so that's why I decided and told him we were just going to be friends. I need female opinions on this, do all men do this? Just retreat after a fight and choose not to solve it? Because honestly that behaviour is not cute, I am not going to supress my feelings for you, thoughts?
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Kristen
21d
INFJ
Pisces
Why would you even bother? There are so many other options. Toss that one back.
7
2
Reply
Corina
22d
ENFP
Cancer
I'm the same way and I've dealt with the same, no not all men are like that. Just avoid the ones that are because there's no resolving conflict with them.
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6
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AJ aka Moonchild ππ
21d
ENFP
Cancer
When someone you are involved with gives you the cold shoulder or ignores you after a dispute, it is often a sign of manipulative behavior. The silent treatment is a classic manipulation tactic used to gain control over your emotions. By withholding communication and affection, the manipulator seeks to create a sense of uncertainty and anxiety, forcing you to question your own actions and feelings. This behavior is not reflective of a healthy, respectful relationship, which should be based on open communication and mutual understanding. It's important to recognize these tactics, ensuring that your emotional well-being is prioritized and that any relationship you engage in is built on mutual respect and honesty.
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0
Reply
β€ Sophia aka Mango Mami β€οΈ
21d
INTJ
Cancer
The 4th time? You allowed that behavior 3 times before, why not allow it now? He has upset you and ignored your feeling before and there were no consequences. It was so ok that you were ok with being his friend. People do what is in their nature to do and we accept it, or we practice self-love and move on.
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1
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K
21d
INFP
Not all, but many prefer dismiss and delay over reflection and mitigation. Some people will take years to acknowledge the importance of the matter, some never. I would reach out at first, pause at second, and withdraw at third. No 4th time. To pretend that they don't have the ability or means to communicate is not okay. Personally, I don't have friends that would avoid conflicts/debates and run away from situations.
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1
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Jeff
21d
INTJ
Aquarius
Each person has their own unique way of solving conflict according to the individual they have conflict with. There's not necessarily a wrong or right way as long as that conflict can remain civil. His avoidance indicates a severe incompatibility with you. You're better off finding a partner who can actually resolve conflict with you in a compatible way. Avoidance doesn't solve anything, and 4 opportunities with the same lack of results speaks for itself.
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0
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JRz π»π€π
21d
INFJ
Scorpio
Four times? You are in a bad path to where you'll end up being hurt at the end while he's enjoying his life. You're allowing him to do this assures him that he'll be able to do anything and you'll forgive him. Imagine if this is happening online, how will the relationship be if it's in real life? As many others before me have said, just move on. Take this as a lesson. It's going to hurt but you should be able to give your time to someone who'll consider your emotions, feelings and love you for who you are. Unfortunately this behavior is common in online dating. Boys and girls who don't communicate, comprehend and consider shouldn't be playing with others.
1
0
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Aleks
21d
INTJ
Leo
Well it depends... Like if you're screaming and shouting... There's no point in trying to resolve stuff, while being infuriated, better to talk it over once both parties are calmed down... Anger leads to more anger... However if you talk in a calm reserved matter, it's a whole different story...
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2
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Miguel
22d
INFJ
Sagittarius
1:35
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1
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Saul
21d
ISFJ
Virgo
From a guys perspective, I don't think so. My wife does something similar. She apologize and takes the blame but doesn't solve the issue. It does gets frustrating because the problem will repeat itself since it was never solved. Try explaining it to him well so he can understand your feelings
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0
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Natasha π
20d
INTP
Cancer
No not all men do this. There is the the polar opposite. The one who just won't let it be. Has to keep bringing it up and making his point. I call it blood letting. Don't put up with this or the ignoring. You need to let these kinds of people walk right out the door with 2024.
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0
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Elle
21d
ISTJ
Yup, been there. It just took one time and I gave a chance, that's it. There is a learned history now with him doing this and you waited him out. He is not going to change and will continue to do what he does every time something like this happens. The people who shut off like that are avoidants and prefer to hide and duck and cover till the storm is over. Then they come back out and act like nothing's happened. They didn't learn skills to confront and negotiate. Those are really crucial skills to have as an adult.
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