Jackson

Posted Saturday, December 9, 2023

2mo

INTJ
Leo

Why do women just randomly block or unadd guys? Why not talk it out?

1

29

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Tracy

2mo

ISTP
Aries

8w7

8

7

2 Awards

Is it really random though? And why do you feel like women should have to "talk it out" with anyone? Nobody owes anyone an explanation for why they're not interested

13

11

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Jackson

2mo

INTJ
Leo

Yes it is random if you didn’t see it coming. Perhaps it’s not random on their end, but on my end it definitely seems random. And I never said women should have to talk it out, just that it’s important to express issues that you may have regardless if you know them a lot or not. It’s all part of growing. Maybe I’m just different but if I have a problem I’m going to voice it. And this isn’t directed at women in specific, it’s just that because I’m seeking women and, since I don’t want to date men, that of course I’ll get this primarily from women. I’m more or less just coming from the perspective that since I would tell someone straight up what I have an issue with and try to fix it, that I think others should do the same.

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Tracy

2mo

ISTP
Aries

8w7

8

7

@Jackson I understand that *you* think they should, but you have to understand that nobody else is going to think exactly like you do. Rejecting a man can be a scary thing for women, a lot of men can't handle it and lash out. Also, you have to remember these people are strangers to you, as you are to them. You might feel a connection and want to get to the bottom of the issue, but they might not be interested in putting that much effort into someone they don't know, which is fair honestly. Your feelings are your responsibility, not theirs

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1

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Markles

2mo

ENFP
Taurus

4w5

4

5

@Tracy Wym, I thought women were supposed to emotionally babysit me like my mother 🤓

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1

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Tracy

2mo

ISTP
Aries

8w7

8

7

@Markles lmao absolutely f'n not 😊

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1

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Markles

2mo

ENFP
Taurus

4w5

4

5

@Tracy Please? I'll even call you mommy, it's such a fair trade don't you think 🤓🤓🤓

1

1

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Tracy

2mo

ISTP
Aries

8w7

8

7

@Markles no 😎

no 😎

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1

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Markles

2mo

ENFP
Taurus

4w5

4

5

@Tracy Wait wait wait, let me try to prove how amazing and healthy of a partner I would be 😎😎😎: You are a beautiful beautiful woman. You are the epitome of grace, style, and femininity. You're my best friend. In fact you're the only friend I need. Here's a good idea, let's get rid of all of our other friends and only be friends with each other. Also, we should cut off family members that don't support our relationship. Also, we should have jobs where we work together. Cause if there's one thing I know, is that if we drop all our friends, cut off our families, and work together, we are guaranteed to have a perfect relationship

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1

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Tracy

2mo

ISTP
Aries

8w7

8

7

@Markles bruhhhh 💀😂

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1

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Markles

2mo

ENFP
Taurus

4w5

4

5

@Tracy Super healthy mindset don't you agree? (It's from the Looney toons cartoon btw lol)

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1

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Tracy

2mo

ISTP
Aries

8w7

8

7

@Markles the healthiest, I would say. There's never been anything healthier in fact. It's the epitome of health and definitely completely rational. Ok I've gotta go spend 12 hours at work now lol, have a good day bro

1

1

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Markles

2mo

ENFP
Taurus

4w5

4

5

1 Award

Usually because you're boring, uninteresting, toxic, or have deep-rooted flaws that they don't want to put the effort into fixing or helping you to figure out. That, or you don't fit the qualities that they find attractive, or something happened in their life. There's a lot of possibilities. If it's the first one, then it makes sense why they would. Women aren't emotional charity, they aren't going to hold your hand and help you become a better person just because you're lonely. For that matter, no one is. The people who will help you improve are the ones who already love you and know you, and know the positives you have to offer, not a stranger online that you barely met

10

8

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Jackson

2mo

INTJ
Leo

With that entire explanation, I can see why marriage is on the decline

0

1

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Markles

2mo

ENFP
Taurus

4w5

4

5

1 Award

@Jackson It's on the decline because people are prioritizing their financial stability and personal goals rather than focusing on fitting the nuclear family stereotype. It's not exactly a good look when I say "women aren't emotional punching bags for you to learn how to be human" and respond with "no wonder marriage is declining" 😕

6

1

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Jackson

2mo

INTJ
Leo

@Markles I responded with that because im trying to be an adult and figure out what I did wrong if anything. I would much prefer someone talk to me about something I did wrong then just block me and be a child and ignore the problem. At that point I would have to say the person who is the problem are the people who block or unadd people without talking to them first. So forgive me when I said “no wonder marriage is declining” when hardly no one anymore can simply talk something out.

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Markles

2mo

ENFP
Taurus

4w5

4

5

@Jackson Most people won't tell you what you did "wrong" because it's a lot of effort and investment into a person who (seemingly) brings little value after the fact. Most women aren't looking for a man who can grow to suit their wants and needs, they're looking for someone who can already fit the description they want, emotionally and personality wise. (Sometimes financial too) I'm not saying that's what you are, a person without qualities, but that's what it looks like to people who don't bother to put in the effort to know you better. Especially when they're flooded with so many possibilities, so many dudes who all feel like they have something unique to offer. I mean, just look at the disproportionate amount of guys on this app. It's like 50 dudes for every girl on here, and it's like that on EVERY dating app my friend. If you want to stand out or convince people that there's more to you than meets the eye, try showing off a personality trait that's truly special or golden. Maybe something really difficult for most people to accomplish, or really difficult to master. For me, it's my desire to be the best possible human being I can be when it comes to emotional maturity and morals. My ability to accept when I'm wrong, communicate how I feel in a healthy way, and express my concerns or wants and needs to people without being toxic about it. It's my willingness to acknowledge toxic masculinity or problematic stereotypes in society and choosing not to conform when the alternatives are so much better. I don't know you, I don't know what you have to offer, but the fact that you're immediately willing to acknowledge or fix whatever it is that might turn people away (even when there's a possibility you aren't doing anything wrong in the first place) instead of jumping to "well it's their fault for having stupid standards" says a lot about your character. I don't know if it's "I'm so lonely I'll do anything" or "I'm willing to acknowledge my own shortcomings" but I sincerely hope it's the latter ☺️

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1

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Jackson

2mo

INTJ
Leo

@Markles I appreciate all the advice

2

1

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Markles

2mo

ENFP
Taurus

4w5

4

5

@Jackson Also, you come from Florida, one of many states that isn't exactly known for respecting women and their bodily autonomy. Some people might look at that and assume you are of the same mindset. For right leaning, conservative, or even religious women, it might be something that attracts them because it's a possibility you think as they do, but to freethinkers or nonconformists it will be a turn off. People will always have a subconscious bias based on how you look, how you talk, or where you're from. Just be aware of that too 👍👍

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0

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Gregolonious

2mo

INTJ
Aries

2w1

2

1

And what would you request they talk out? 🙂🍵

7

0

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James

2mo

INTJ
Pisces

4w5

4

5

Nothing to talk about. I did have one girl try to argue her way into a relationship once, "why not me?" So, I think that is why some people do that. It can be unpleasant, but it was never going to happen anyway.

3

0

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Attila

2mo

INFJ
Cancer

4w5

4

5

It is because they are EVIL! Pure evil! Possible reasons: -too immature to explain things -lack of patience to explain things -they dislike you or hate you so they unmatch or block instantly. -they didn't like your message, question or response so they unmatch. -they act on impulse, the moment they feel angry or something negative BOOM! Gone! We all prefer to have some feedback or a honest response but many don't have the patience to give an explanation. This experience turns online dating into a MINEFIELD 😬 You step on a mine and it is all gone! 💥 (many mines are extremely fragile) Next time it happens just know that she wasn't a good match with you anyways. If a woman truly likes you then she will stay and won't unmatch you instantly just like that. A lot of women can be heartless, immature and unaware that you prefer to talk so don't let these negative experiences to ruin your attitude. A real woman who truly cares and likes you will explain things or have a discussion. The sooner the unmatching/blocking happens the better so you know what kind of woman you are dealing with.. (impatient, toxic or immature kind)

0

0

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Kristen

2mo

INFJ
Pisces

4w5

4

5

If I've exchanged a handful of messages with someone and they are off putting in some way, I am not going to waste my time and energy having a discussion with them about why I don't feel like talking to them anymore.

0

0

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SuSu

2mo

INFJ
Sagittarius

1w2

1

2

I talk up to a certain point...but when I notice someone being really aggressive, manipulative, then I'm gone. Or if someone starts two days after DM with "I love you" 🙄, then I try to make clear that nonsense. If they are talking like that more, I'm gone. I only block if someone insults me, spread hate or try to bully me

0

0

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T. Allen

2mo

INFJ
Scorpio

8w7

8

7

No idea why. That's their decision. It's usually best to pack it up and not worry about it. It doesn't really matter. I think deep down it might hurt someone's ego to get blocked or unadded or whatnot. This is just my opinion obviously.

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