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Universes
Posted Tuesday, March 29, 2022
2y
ENFJ
Libra
Why do some men get offended when women make the first move?
Recently I had an experience wherein I was into someone and decided to confess that i would love to date him. But the guy got scared and is now ignoring me😅😂 Did I trigger some spot of male ego? (edited)
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Drew
2y
INTP
Why do you assume it's a gender thing, and why do you assume it's about his ego? Maybe he just doesn't like you like that, and now communicating feels awkward. Or maybe there's something specific about how you handled the thing that just made him uncomfortable.
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Mella
2y
INTP
Taurus
It means he isn't attracted to you. So many men get so offended when a woman they deem unattractive dares to express an interest in them. Like, they seriously act like any woman who doesn't give them pantsfeelings should go crawl under a rock and die, or something. But they themselves are always hitting on women out of their league, and would hulk out in wounded narc rage if any of those women reacted to him so negatively. He's a jerk. I'm sorry.
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Patrick
2y
INFJ
Aries
Perhaps he wasn't looking for a relationship and just wanted a friend to talk to? I mean I've done that once or twice to my friend when she confessed to me but i was happy with the friendship. Anyway whatever the reason are, you shouldn't be taking it personally, because it's not really your fault (or anyone's fault). You're perfect just the way you are 💙
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Joshua
2y
INTJ
Based on the very little context provided in the post, it sounds like you are very much misinterpreting the situation. If you scared someone, and they started ignoring you, that doesn't at all mean that you triggered "some spot of male ego" or that you offended him. I complete understand being forced to make assumptions when the other person isn't there to provide answers, but I'm pretty sure you're either largely misunderstanding the situation, or need to provide more context
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Reeg
2y
ENFP
Cancer
Nah you genuinely scared him It's ok👍 i did too lol It happens, it's ok
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The Couch
2y
ESFP
Scorpio
Maybe the guy didn't feel romantically about you. It doesn't have to be an ego thing.
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Khaja Zameeruddin Ahmed
2y
INFJ
Virgo
I think this has been online right? I say that Ego is a part of human mentality, and mostly not only males . Most people don't have a clarity of what do they really seek for. And here very thing goes off track and all the intuitions hit the brain which makes us feel disgusting.
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Daniel
2y
ESTP
Virgo
Not all men are like these, in fact for me I was into a woman way more when she first approached me/was straight to that she likes me, I Dated two girls who did this because for me I like that aspect of being straightforward/taking that first move. It’s Super attractive to me so It’s really not every guy
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Victoria
2y
ISFP
Taurus
Let's switch up the roles a bit. If a guy decided to confess that they would love to date you out of no where would you not be freaked out by it? Not even a little? Like if you had said, hey I really like you I hope you like me too I would like to date you. Then that's one thing. But if you just jumped in going, hey I just want to confess that I would love to date you. That is a bit creepy to throw the words confess and love around someone that's still kinda a stranger to you so easily. Just reading your post I was creeped out by it. Just gotta watch how you say things to not freak someone out.
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Conor Geary
2y
INTP
Leo
I think there are many other possibilities we as commenter don't know because we are seeing this through the lens of the narrow perspective you've given us. It could be he's shy, he wasn't looking for that, he's immature and doesn't properly know how to turn someone down, he might have gotten spooked by your boldness, or a million other reasons. Is there a particular reason you want to view this through this particular lense? Do you perhaps feel a little hurt by his reaction, and it's made easier to attribute it to immutable characteristics that can't be changed? God knows I've been rejected many times, i can understand the pain that comes with it and the allure of blaming the opposite sex. But speaking as a male, no I don't think that's it.
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Levente
2y
ISTJ
Capricorn
I would love of a woman would make the first move. So not sure how he thought it was offensive.
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Jonathan
2y
ESFP
Taurus
It depends on the man, some people would be turned away because they'd feel embarrassed since culture in general has placed this stigma that men have to be the strong providers. So when a female approaches them first they feel embarrassed that they didn't fulfill their "role". Personally I my self wouldn't care since I can get a little uneasy and won't always move first but that's me.
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Matthew
2y
INTP
Aries
If you did it's because he's not secure with himself. Hell I'm so secure in myself I have no problem discussing anything about me. One of the things I will say is I love it if a chick were to come and ask me out. She'd have major brownie points right there with that. (edited)
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Brendan
2y
INTJ
Aries
That sounds like he might just be scared of dating/relationships. It can be very intimidating to be responsible for someone's time and emotional investment, and he might just not be ready to even come close to that 🤷
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Johnathon
2y
INTP
Taurus
It’s super attractive when a girl makes the first move honestly, if they don’t like it there are plenty of men out there that do.
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Mystery wolf
2y
INFJ
Taurus
Maybe it was so much unexpected for him. Or he might be some stereotypical men who cannot accept a woman taking initiative.
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Cynthia
2y
INTJ
Cancer
Principle of least interest. The one who cares less has more power, works the same in business negotiations too. From what I’ve seen, usually relationships only work if the man shows interest first because women are generally more reactive and men more proactive. That’s not to say it’s like that for everyone, especially in this day and age.
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