Diving into the art of early conversation feedback 🌊🗣️ Recently, I casually shared my thoughts on someone's smile (just a friendly: 'I felt it'd be nice if she smiled more, it was cute'), only to find it can be a deal-breaker for some reason. 🤔 I've only ever shared it because I genuinely liked her smile, haha. However, she mentioned that all girls hate to hear that. I found i intriguing and a bit worrisome. ^^; So for my dear ladies out there! -- is mentioning such things a big no-no in your book, or do you believe in the honesty game? Share your thoughts on: expressing opinions without causing discomfort! 🙌🏻 #OpinionTalks

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Lili (pseudonym)

INTP

I think if there was a lot going on for both of you, this remark wouldn't have been a deal breaker. Most likely she was already dissatisfied with how things have been and that was just the final straw. So, why is it a deal at all you might ask. People have different ways to express themselves with mimics. Some show their emotions from the get go and it's natural to them, some need time to warm up to you to show more expression and some don't express their emotions though mimics at all. So when you say 'smile more' you're basically telling her, that she is not ok the way she is and should change. Not the nicest thing to say about anyone. But that's just one dimension. The other one is, whether she was was happy enough to smile in the first place. A genuine smile is an expression of joy or happiness. Some people will fake a smile cause of certain incentives or out of someone else's expectations (like yours for example). But many people will refuse to pretend they're happy when they are not. So basically, when you tell someone they should smile more, you're implying that their real self is not good enough for the occasion so they should act being someone else or that they're intentionally in a bad mood and should 'just be happy' more often.

Kai

ESTJ

Capricorn

What exactly did you say? "You should smile more."?

Sai

Author

ENFJ

Aquarius

@✨Mystic✨ Appreciate the understanding 😊 Dating's for sure a tricky dance. While some find it frustrating, I believe impatience means missing potential connections. Balancing expectations and openness is a challenge, but it's what makes the journey worthwhile. After all, aren't we here to try new things, take initiative, and break boundaries? Maybe those who don't put any effort just aren't worth pursuing. Anyways, I'll continue working on myself, see where things go eventually ~ 😆 i just hope people be real with their profiles and words lol

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