Who should pay on a first date🤔 My friend recently went on a first date with a guy and happily it went really well until it came to paying the bill and he wouldn't let her pay a thing.. my friend hated this and isn't sure about going on a second date🙈 So who should pay the bill?

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INFJ

Capricorn

Whoever invited ?

INFJ

Scorpio

So the way it works for me is, that if I'm invited to go out I don't expect to cover any part of the bill and vice versa. Unless a agreement was made to go dutch

ENTP

Real life footage of me and my crush waiting for the other to ask us out so we don't have to pay for food

ENTJ

Leo

Split, especially early on. IMO shows neither of you are looking to become a designated dependent. If either can't afford the bill - then maybe it would be a good idea to steer clear of expensive places at least early on, while you are still figuring out where this is headed.

ENFJ

Libra

I had this exact situation once with a first date. We had already known each other in person, got to be friends from talking over a few weeks, I ask her out and she says yes. When the bill comes she insists on paying! 😳I politely said it's okay I can do it, but she insists, says I can pay the tip. I didn't want to make it an issue so I relented and she paid. Later on she admitted she wanted me to fight her more on it because she really didn't have the money for it, says it's a woman thing... Reading the comments here I guess she thought I would feel entitled to making out if I paid. But given how we related before I asked her out I would be surprised she would think that. C'est la vie. 🤷 (edited)

INFJ

Perfect time to test their conflict resolution skills.

ISTJ

Cancer

Most guys don't care tbh, but if you split the bill it will reflect what you think about how things are going to go for the rest of the relationship

ISFJ

Virgo

Your friend seems to be so upset about this one factor that she is willing to ignore all the other positive experiences the guy went out of his way to provide. Either the rest of the date did not go as well as you described, or she is associating a lot more complications to paying the bill.

INTJ

Scorpio

Why is he being judged for this? She needs to communicate with him in a serious manner that it's totally fine for her to pay her own way. It might take some insisting. From a cultural standpoint these ideas are enforced, it's unlikely to be a sign of anything bad, but rather an idea that's been drilled into all of us from all the way back when we were kids. If it went well enough to cause a line of communication that lead to this questioning, it went well enough to give the guy another chance and have some patience with that. These things certainly shouldn't have anything to do with gender, but we REALLY aren't used to this. Maybe she should attempt to strike a deal with him that dictates that they take turns?

INFJ

Aries

Personally my GF doesn't like me to pay for everything and since we share everything including our finances it doesn't matter at all since it's basically our money anyway. If I have easily available money I'll pay or vice versa, if she needs money I send her money , if I need money she sends me money. We don't play that would gender thing it's a relationship , a team. I personally would consider it a red flag if a girl never tried to split a bill , I don't care if your broke if you at LEAST show me you would or tried to that's good enough for me and I'll cover the whole thing no issues and don't expect anything in return as I don't and never will count favors (edited)

INTP

Aries

I don't think either "should" but as a guy it's ME who is taking YOU out, so I am going to make the attempt to pay the full bill. if the woman wants to pay or split or leave the tip I don't argue with her and it doesn't bother me (edited)

INTP

Gemini

It really depends on what you mean by a 'first date". As far as I'm concerned if you met online and this is your first meeting, it's not a real date and each person should pay for themselves. Too many men think you owe them something if they pay. If it's someone you already know and have met, and he's the one asking, it wouldn't be wrong to split the bill but I wouldn't make an issue of it if he insists on paying. I'm 52, though, so young people might feel differently.

ISTP

Libra

I feel like, the invite-er kind of signs up to pay for the invite-ee. Why would you invite someone out and insist that they pay for your food? LOL If there's a disagreement, would it not just be easier to pay for your own food and move on? (edited)

INFP

Virgo

I would always offer, and expect, to pay on the first date but expect the woman to pay on the second (unless she's particularly poor) but it's nice if she offers to split the bill. I know it's tradition but it's more about mutual respect for me and tells you something about your date. What she does is an indication of whether she is worth continuing with, so it's useful to offer to pay and see if she takes it for granted or whatever. But communication is key to any good relationship.

ENFP

Pisces

I always go on a date prepared to split the bill, but I don't necessarily feel uncomfortable if my date otters to cover it. I'm always grateful if they do, but I never expect it, if that makes sense. And if there is a second date, I offer to cover it if they got the first one

INTP

Taurus

Split it. Prevents anyone from feeling responsible to 'pay back'.

ISTJ

Virgo

Unless you are actually in a relationship I'd split the bill. When in a relationship it can work out depending on how the relationship works out, like I'd pay for dinner, then next time she pays for lunch, etc

INFP

Aquarius

Whatever works I guess, but I personally would pay it whole, it doesn't matter to me, but ive never been on a date before so idk (edited)

INTP

Capricorn

Who ever is taking the other out on a date should pay

ESFP

Gemini

Split two way for sample we go different direction one get tickets 🎟 and other get food and popcorn 🍿 unless guy want to pay for first date I will let them but not let girl pay at all I can't except.know how your friend feel I would end it before it gets worst been through it and move on (edited)

INTJ

Pisces

I don't think its a him or her, its whos bringing in the cashflow, some women that are more masculine might try and pay for the bill because they are with a feminized man.

INFJ

Cancer

I usually pay if I invite someone out, but there have been times where It has been split.

INTJ

Aries

I definitely prefer to split the bill. I find it very outdated to expect one person to cover everything. Also, one blind date an ex friend forced me to go on tried to pull this and let's just say he was absolutely a nightmare as he felt entitled after insisting on paying.

INFJ

Virgo

I like splitting the bill haha

ENTJ

Cancer

Just take turns paying the bill. That way there will be a 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th more dates and so on.

ENFP

Capricorn

Wow!! So many interesting opinions on this... Isnt it just crazy that we still debate about this... Me personally I don't expect any guy to pay for me on a first date!

INFJ

Aquarius

My parents taught me to treat women nicely. As a courtesy, I'd pay on the first date. I mean we're men. The word "gentleman" exist for a reason. It's not to belittle the woman or anything, not at all. It's just a pure and good gesture. If your friend complained about a man being nice and contemplates not going on a second date because of it, your friend needs help. Just say thank you, be appreciative and move on. What's there to think about? God you westerners I swear..

ESFP

Aries

Just split it, dont see a reason not to, both sides agreed to it in the first place

INFP

Cancer

So why is it such a problem for him not to let her pay? That sounds a little petty like seriously? A guy should be able to pay for a date to show he likes a female and to show he's willing to take care of her and treat her every now and then and if that's a problem you probably shouldn't be going on dates because all that sounds like is petty feminism that doesn't belong on a date it's stupid and your friend has no reason to be mad except for being petty a guy is willing to treat her to a date if your really that petty to be mad about him paying well..there won't be a second date 💯💯💯

INTP

Gemini

First date should be free since it's a first date. Why spend money on something that is statistically proven to not last long once defined as dating?

INTJ

Virgo

I think it's largely going to depend on how things turn out. If I asked a girl out and she said yes (never going to happen, on both accounts) then I wouldn't expect her to pay for the events. If anything it would be split, but if I felt things were going really well and I liked her a lot, then I wouldn't mind paying and then hoping to set up another night out. If I wasn't really feeling the vibe or the chemistry just wasn't there then split the bill and then move on.

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Some things didn't work out bec you deserve so much better.

ISTJ

💯

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You know what's gross

When someone comes to these apps with the sole reason of taking advantage of someone.

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I will still want you but I'm starting to choose myself so if you want me in your life start proving it because I'm not chasing you anymore or fighting for a spot.

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My fav feminine era 😍

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Totally agree

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Aquarius

I hope this helps some folks

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Taurus

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This is happening over and over again and it is really mentally draining. You start liking somone only for them to say this. Any advice?

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INTJ

Standing around and waiting for someone to stop doing the things that you’ve told them bother you, or waiting on them to treat you right…it’s nothing less then an absolute disrespect and disregard for yourself and your worth. Usually it’s so subtle that the majority of the time you dont notice it!

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Sagittarius

Looking for a serious relationship

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Gemini

A man is the crown of a woman’s head, and a crown is only worn by queens..

So make her a queen in your heart, you will be a crown above her head 👑

INTJ

Cancer

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1/2

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Aquarius

???

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😁

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Scorpio

😮

14d

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Relationshipadvice Community

Whoever invited ?

So the way it works for me is, that if I'm invited to go out I don't expect to cover any part of the bill and vice versa. Unless a agreement was made to go dutch

Real life footage of me and my crush waiting for the other to ask us out so we don't have to pay for food

Split, especially early on. IMO shows neither of you are looking to become a designated dependent. If either can't afford the bill - then maybe it would be a good idea to steer clear of expensive places at least early on, while you are still figuring out where this is headed.

Perfect time to test their conflict resolution skills.

Most guys don't care tbh, but if you split the bill it will reflect what you think about how things are going to go for the rest of the relationship

Your friend seems to be so upset about this one factor that she is willing to ignore all the other positive experiences the guy went out of his way to provide. Either the rest of the date did not go as well as you described, or she is associating a lot more complications to paying the bill.

I don't think either "should" but as a guy it's ME who is taking YOU out, so I am going to make the attempt to pay the full bill. if the woman wants to pay or split or leave the tip I don't argue with her and it doesn't bother me (edited)

I feel like, the invite-er kind of signs up to pay for the invite-ee. Why would you invite someone out and insist that they pay for your food? LOL If there's a disagreement, would it not just be easier to pay for your own food and move on? (edited)

I always go on a date prepared to split the bill, but I don't necessarily feel uncomfortable if my date otters to cover it. I'm always grateful if they do, but I never expect it, if that makes sense. And if there is a second date, I offer to cover it if they got the first one

Split it. Prevents anyone from feeling responsible to 'pay back'.

Unless you are actually in a relationship I'd split the bill. When in a relationship it can work out depending on how the relationship works out, like I'd pay for dinner, then next time she pays for lunch, etc

Whatever works I guess, but I personally would pay it whole, it doesn't matter to me, but ive never been on a date before so idk (edited)

Who ever is taking the other out on a date should pay

I don't think its a him or her, its whos bringing in the cashflow, some women that are more masculine might try and pay for the bill because they are with a feminized man.

I usually pay if I invite someone out, but there have been times where It has been split.

I definitely prefer to split the bill. I find it very outdated to expect one person to cover everything. Also, one blind date an ex friend forced me to go on tried to pull this and let's just say he was absolutely a nightmare as he felt entitled after insisting on paying.

I like splitting the bill haha

Just take turns paying the bill. That way there will be a 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th more dates and so on.

Wow!! So many interesting opinions on this... Isnt it just crazy that we still debate about this... Me personally I don't expect any guy to pay for me on a first date!

Just split it, dont see a reason not to, both sides agreed to it in the first place

First date should be free since it's a first date. Why spend money on something that is statistically proven to not last long once defined as dating?

Related Posts

Hi

Mood

Some things didn't work out bec you deserve so much better.

💯

You know what's gross

I will still want you but I'm starting to choose myself so if you want me in your life start proving it because I'm not chasing you anymore or fighting for a spot.

My fav feminine era 😍

Is it ghosting when you stop texting someone because you're waiting for them to initiate a conversation (and they never do, so that's it)?

They do

Totally agree

💗

🩷

I hope this helps some folks

How do you deal with 'you are a nice guy and you will meet someone else'?

What Makes a Relationship Strong? ❤️

Can some pls rate my profile,am I that ugly😅

One relationship advice you would give to someone who's never been in a relationship would be...?

Have respect to one's self

🍃

💯 when I walk away and you wonder why...look at how you treated me and how long and what I did when I was still there for you

This Relationship Truth

The Woman Who Believes She’s Always Right Will Eventually Ruin Her Relationship/Marriage

🫰

Sunil gehlot

👻

❤️

Looking for a serious relationship

A man is the crown of a woman’s head, and a crown is only worn by queens..

Anyone ever needs advice or somewhere to vent, feel free to message me

❤️

???

😁

😮

Irony? Madness?

Relationship

This or nothing 🙌🏻