I'm happy to put my opinion out and be judged but also spark discussion if needed. I'm happy that I've got a decent paying job and a car so it gives me flexibility to travel and pay for a date. (No .. I am not "lucky" ... i worked very hard for it). I find dating difficult. I tend to try and stick local as I've been blasted in the past for driving 2 and a half hours each way to a date and they never responded or turned up (a "never again" moment) I try and be accommodating for the other person, take in what they say, what they enjoy and pick a date that they will like, even if it means stepping out my comfort zone. I am quite happy on a first date to pay for it, even if I have had to travel. However, when I added "within reason" to what I would pay, I got scrutinised what that meant. I explained that if they ordered the most expensive things on the menu (hundreds of pounds) then i would say "I don't have the money for it" and of course we both parted ways soon after as she thought i "could not provide". I don't feel like I was in the wrong as I have to look after myself as well and I'm not simply a walking wallet. But love to know from a different perspective if have the wrong mindset.

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Olivia

INFJ

Pisces

1 Award

Personally, I think everything should be 50/50 for a first date especially as you don't know if it'll go any further. It's nice to offer to pay but I don't think it should be assumed. I prefer to keep it equal.

Zoey

ENTP

Taurus

1 Award

It depends on the people involved. I wouldn't suggest going on a first date that could total over 100 pounds to begin with if it's not economically feasible. Do something cheap like going to a museum or playing mini golf. The financial expectations of people on dates and within relationships has to do with their financial stability and general beliefs regarding gender roles. Some women may not realistically be able to afford to go 50/50 or pay most of the time. Some women may be able to afford it but believe that men are supposed to pay no matter what. Other women may prefer to pay for themselves no matter what. It just depends on the person. In my opinion, if it's a point of contention, it's probably best to discuss prior to scheduling a date. It's a necessary conversation to have, and if someone is turned off by where ever you stand, then they're simply not compatible with you. There is no "wrong" or "right" opinion on this. It's just about what people can realistically afford and what they actually want to do and can live with. In other words it's just a matter of compatibility.

Sasha

ENFJ

Sagittarius

In my opinion, first date doesnt have to be that expensive. It can be simple where people aim to know more and understand each other. It can be as simple as coffee or going for bowling together. Also, the first date should be paid 50-50 as its mutual.

⭐Jay 🇬🇧⭐

Author

ISTP

Cancer

Yes dont worry the date didn't last long shortly after and we parted ways. As they say; Communication is key. I guess should there be any differences, it's down to both to work out a compromise to make things works, or not work. In-person dating is a must for me. It's about spending time together with no online distractions (being on their phones all the time is a topic for another post!)

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Guy pays for everything...right?

Dating Community

Personally, I think everything should be 50/50 for a first date especially as you don't know if it'll go any further. It's nice to offer to pay but I don't think it should be assumed. I prefer to keep it equal.

In my opinion, first date doesnt have to be that expensive. It can be simple where people aim to know more and understand each other. It can be as simple as coffee or going for bowling together. Also, the first date should be paid 50-50 as its mutual.

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